I saw a lion in a bar, trying to pick up a lioness literally half his age
and I'm like "man, you must have *no* pride"
Just finished my first shift as a lion impersonator.
It was a roaring success.
An arrogant gazelle walks up to a bunch of lions and tells them how much better he is than them.
He was consumed by pride.
I asked what the lion in my wardrobe was doing.
He said it was Narnia business
What do you call a group of lions partying on ships in Gibraltar?
A strait pride parade.
If a lion is the king of the jungle...
Then shouldn’t they call it a reignforest?
I really like the Lion King
and every day the urge to sing one of the songs is just a whim away, a whim away, a whim away.
What did the Mountain lion say to the bathroom attendant?
Out of the way, I’m about to Puma pants!
When a lion takes a lioness from another lion, he kills and eats any cubs she has. You'd think he'd be ashamed of himself.
But apparently he just swallows his pride.
What do you get when you cross a lion with a parrot?
I don't know, but when it talks, you better listen.
3 animals enter a bar. A lion, a tiger and a bear.
Oh my!
I have the heart of a lion
And a lifetime ban from the San Diego Zoo.
How do lions greet people?
"Pleased to eat you!"
What is a lion’s favourite cheese?
Roarquefort
What did the first century Christian say about the lion that killed his wife?
I'm Gladiator.
A lion would never cheat on its wife.
But a Tiger wood.
Once you've seen one Lion eat a Giraffe...
You've seen a maul!