What's the opposite of an elephant?
An eleph-antonym.
What do you get when you cross two fish with two elephants?
A pair of swimming trunks.
Hunting elephants is illegal as ivory well know.
Anything unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.
What do you call an elephant with rotors?
A Nellie-copter.
What animals were last to leave the ark?
The elephants as they had to pack their trunks.
What do you call a flying elephant?
A jumbo jet.
What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
Eleph-ino! (Sounds like "Hell if I know!")
Looking after more than one elephant at a time requires the ability to multi-tusk.
What do you call a light-headed elephant?
An ele-faint.
What's grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers?
Cinderella-phant.
What do you call an elephant with an aerial on his head?
An elephant-enna.
What do you call an elephant that’s never clean?
A smelly-phant.
What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
The elephantom of the opera.
Who do elephants get their Christmas presents from?
Elephanta Claus.
An elephant's opinion carries a lot of weight.
Why did the elephant ask to borrow a suitcase?
Because he only had a little trunk.
Why did the elephant start the stampede?
Because it wanted to be herd.
What’s an elephant’s favorite sport?
Squash.
What do you call an elephant that never washes?
A smelly-phant.
I had a job circumcising elephants.
The base salary wasn't great, but the tips were huge.
Elephants will toil all day, and they work for peanuts.
How do elephants bathe?
With their trunks on.
Why don’t elephants use computers?
Because they’re afraid of the mouse.
What’s an elephant’s secret talent?
They’re great at multi-tusking.
Hannibal crossed the Alps because it was safer than crossing the elephants.