Toilet paper plays an important roll in my life, it would be pretty sh**ty without it.
Why do toilet paper rolls have trust issues?
They're always getting ripped off.
It wasn’t my idea to get bidet...
But now I kinda like the little squirt.
I always take a dump at 11:59 PM. That way, when the clock strikes midnight it’s the same sh**, different day.
When is it okay to wash your shoes in the toilet?
When there's a bidet. People use them to wash their booties.
What did the poop shoveler say when he quit his job?
"I'm dung with this sh*t!"
Why are urinals the worst place to spend time?
Because it’s where all the di**s hang out.
Why did the painter take a dump on the floor?
It was the work of fart.
All the toilets in the police station have disappeared and they are asking for witnesses.
They currently have nothing to go on.
Guess what I got my toilet for its birthday?
A Urinal cake.
What type of toilet paper does the math house have?
Multiply.
The urinals were broken at my dad's work
He had to walk a long distance to go to the bathroom. When the plumber came and informed him the urinals were fixed, my dad told him "I'm relieved!"
I just installed a brand new Luxe bidet!
I’ve been having a blast.
"Have you seen our toilet roll?" asked my wife.
"Don't be silly," I replied.
"A toilet is a stationary object."
Today I learned some people have a phobia of flushing the toilet.
That must be a sh***y phobia to have.
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