What did King Arthur call his sneakiest knight?
Sir Valence.
A knight bursts into a blacksmith and yells "You smelt my armor!"
The blacksmith was calm and collected and replied: "Yes, and what a lovely scent it had."
Who was the knight that was very secretive?
Sir Reptitious
What do you call a cow apart of the Knights of the Round Table?
Sir Loin
Did you know that back in medieval times, soldiers would sleep with lanterns next to them so they could see if something happened.
They were called "Knight Lights"
How did they name those guys who wore shiny armor in medieval times?
They couldn't think of a name, so they decided to call it a knight.
When does a medieval soldier sleep?
Knight time
When does a medieval soldier sleep?
Knight time
Lance is an uncommon name nowadays but in medieval times...
people were called Lance a lot.
What do you call a Medieval knight who's always sure of himself?
Sir Tainly.
What was written on a knight's headstone?
Rust in peace.
What was Camelot famous for?
It's knight life.
Why did Arthur have a round table?
So nobody could corner him!
What do you call a knight who wants to overthrow the King?
Sir Plant.
Which one of King Arthur's knights named the Round Table?
Sir Cumference
Medieval cures...
Were leeches on society
Dance music can be traced back to medieval times when a farmer dropped some heavy beets.
Why were people in the Medieval times so self absorbed?
Because they thought that they were the center of the universe.
Why couldn't Vivaldi play medieval music?
Because his violin was Baroque
What do you call a medieval siege machine that throws flowers?
A trebouquet
Did you hear about the medieval kinghunter?
He excelled in throne weapons
It was quite dangerous for messengers back in the medieval era.
They often had to wear mail armor.
No one could measure their height in medieval kingdoms.
Only the Ruler could.
Why did the medieval Indian go to the doctor?
He was feeling a bit Sikh
I think I met a medieval water snake
But I can't tell if it actually happened or if it was a dream.
It was totally Sir Eel.
How do Medieval sheep protest prisons?
They storm the baaaastille.
How did one become a medieval executioner?
You had to axe nicely.
Why do medieval ghosts refuse to stop at McDonald's?
They prefer Wight Castle.
If I lived in medieval times, I'd be a tavern guard.
I've always been known for my Inn-Security.
Did you see that their is a Medieval play about menstruation?
It's a period piece
When medieval armies went off to war...
were they playing for keeps?
What do you call a Medieval spy?
Sir Veillance
What do you call a stunt rider from the 1200's?
Medieval Knievel
I like my wine like I like my medieval cities.
Fortified.
What can you find in both medieval English castles and American art museums?
Norman Rock Wells.
What did the borg say to the medieval peasant?
Resistance if feudal
What do you call a medieval dentist?
A plaque doctor.
What did the Medieval Gynecologist say to his patients?
At your cervix, m'lady
I would say that life for the majority of people in the middle ages was rather peasant.
Did you know there were vegetarians in Medieval Europe?
More often than not, they were called "peasants"
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
If you go to Medieval Times and watch the jousts, there is a sir charge.
Medieval Kings and Queens were carried by their soldiers and servants. I am not lying, they litter-ally carried that way!
During the medieval time period, there weren't many extremely bad people. There were only mid-evil people during that age.
Astonishingly, the first comic strip known to man was created by King John of England. It was called the 'Manga-Carta'!
In the old times, the medieval kings and queens would only visit the dentist just before their coronation. This is because they wanted their teeth crowned!
Medieval castles would have been great hangout spots in modern times because they had a great knight life!
My brother was reading a book about a medieval castle that always had its drawbridge up. Unfortunately, he couldn't really get into the book!
The medieval ages were technologically advanced. Take, for example, the guillotine, it was such cutting-edge technology.
In the medieval ages, chess was a very popular game among Kings and Queens. This was because they had castles in it!