What do you call a distilled botanical that likes to play the guitar??
Ginny Hendrix
I used to think that all radios had antennae, then I realized it was a stereo type.
How are trumpets like pirates?
They both murder in the high C’s.
I used to be the triangle player in a Jamaican band but I had to quit....
It was always just one ting after another.
What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is happy when the case is closed.
Which element is a member of famous rock band?
Hg
I'm 6'6", 280lb, and I've played piano for 23 years
I'm a huge pianist.
What's a bipolar person's favorite type of music? Swing.
Being a soprano is a great opera tunity.
Why was the square dance fiddler arrested for smuggling?
Because of his contra band...
Why was the piano laughing?
Because I was tickling his ivories
Why couldn’t the athlete listen to her music?
Because she broke the record.
Our church band is just two ladies on percussion...
It’s quite the CoNunDrum
Why can't a Platypus be trusted on the radio?
Because they all have fowl mouths.
What do you call a musician with problems? a trebled man.
I was supposed to play the trumpet
But I blew it.
What was stolen from the music store? The lute.
Want to start a Hula band that covers music by Poison.
Gonna call it Poi, Son.
What’s a golf clubs favorite type of music?
Swing.
I had a job repairing 17th century violins...
I only fixed instruments that were BAROQUE.
What do you get when you play New Age music backwards?
New Age music.
What music are balloons scared of? Pop music
How did the turkey win the talent show? With his drum-sticks.
A drummer got a tattoo of a drum kit on himself
It was very cymbalic.
I always put my money in drums
Because it’s a sound investment.
I asked my musician friend if he plays by ear.
He said, "Yes, it's a violin. That is how you hold it."
What concert costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?
He was playing by ear.
What do you call a low-quality Russian composer, pianist, and conductor of the late Romantic period?
Knockmaninoff.
Why can’t skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
What does a trumpet and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.
You know those silly hacker movies where they're hacking so hard they type on two keyboards at once?
Such blatant stereo-typing
I heard Placebo on the radio. I actually thought it was The Cure.
When did the pianist finally turn their life around?
After they hit Rockbottomoff.
Where did the music teacher leave her keys?
In the piano.
What was the pianist doing at the mall?
Chopin.
Which genre of music appeals to most cheeses? R'n'Brie
You ever heard the Stormtrooper band?
Probably not, they've never had a hit.
What do you call a pianist who throws trash everywhere?
Litterachi.
Asked a pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?"
Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
Ringo, John snd George walked into an electric guitar shop...
They were less Paul.
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