Why was the cheese happy in the kitchen?
He thought he was grater than everyone else.
I was watching an Australian cooking show recently and the audience began applauding when the chef made meringue. Which is odd because...
Australians usually boo meringue.
My son asked me where the pan was.
I told him, naturally, it went on a wok.
I came to a fork in the road.
I proceeded to pick it up.
Don't use raw milk to make butter
It's not worth the whisk.
How do you call a straw used for drinking orangeade?
Fantastick.
I was serving my friend a roast in my tiny shoebox apartment. He boasted that he could cook the same dish in a mere two hours...
But I cooked it in a minute flat.
A baker fell down the stairs with a platter full of cookies.
As they say, that's the way the cookies crumbled.
Why did the pony ask for a glass of water?
Because he felt like he was a little horse.
Justice is a dish best served cold
Because otherwise it would be justwater.
What will a chinese grill use when a wok is too slow
A wun.
I saw an Italian man cooking pasta with a flame thrower.
I cannoli imagine what he was thinking.
Two flies are playing football on a saucer.
They’re practicing for the cup.
How do you stop Canadian bacon from curling in a frying pan?
Take away its tiny brooms
Did you hear about the fellow who threw away his new iron skillet?
It smelt funny...
So I heard this joke about glass
But it clearly shouldn’t have been made
why did the spoon show up dressed as a knife ?
Invitation said to look sharp.
Did you hear about the spoon? It caused quite a stir!
If I put dull-tasting food in a bowl, will it have a bowlder taste?
I really hate straws.
They suck.
I always remember to eat my soup with a spoon.
It’s un-fork-edible.
When whisking something, do it with caution.
It’s whisky business.
Got emotional hearing about the role of tectonic plates in earthquakes. It was really moving.
Was arguing with a friend in a restaurant recently when the waiter ran over and took the plate of garlic bread and the coleslaw. I wish he’d stop taking sides.
I was boiling vegetables in the saucepan the other day when my wife went to move it...
I said careful, it’s got a leek in it.
I tried smoking pot once.
I choked on the handle.
I used to have an electric wok but I had to get rid of it
Wouldn’t run.
My wife was scratching the glass jar with a metal spoon...
It was jarring!!!
A tuning fork is, essentially, a pitch fork.
What do you call a monk who steals a grilled cheese sandwich right off the griddle?
Out of the frying pan and into the friar.
So my daughter is calling me all excited. I come by her room to her holding her cup above her head and says "Dad look..."
"I'm breathing underwater."
My friend just got 3 kittens named Spoon, Fork, and Knife. When I asked why those names, they smiled and said, "Isn't it obvious?"
"They're catlery"
Why did Don Corleone send back the plate for his coffee cup?
Someone gave him a saucer he could not reuse.
I'm taking indian cooking classes, because
I'm just so curryous about it.
If you missed essential tomato cooking class
You can’t ketchup.
I left my job at the Chinese restaurant and took my favourite frying pan, until I heard the owner yell...
"Don’t wok away from me!"
Why does the superhero shred his cheese?
For the grater good.
I have a phobia of using the wrong amounts of ingredients when I’m cooking
So I’ve been taking measures to deal with it.
I used to work at a cutlery store, but I quit
No more Mr. Knife guy.
I was washing the dishes today and got so frustrated I screamed into a collander.
I think I strained my voice.
My car keeps telling me my door is ajar. It's not a jar you idiot it's a door.
One of my kitchen utensils seems to be playing classical music.
Think it’s the Chopin board.
What do you call a cap to a jar that doesn't fit?
An invalid.
Why did i murder the woman who served me a glass of wine?
Because i wanted tequila.
What do you call it when you have to quickly eat a beef dish wrapped in pastry crust?
A brief Wellington
A kitchen knife and fork had a race. Who won? Neither, it ended in a drawer.
How is Europe like a frying pan?
It has Greece at the bottom.
It’s amazing how most jars look alike...
The resemblance is uncanny
I watched an eclipse through my colander, now I’ve strained my eyes.
What did the astronaut see in his frying pan?
An Unidentified Frying Object.
Go to BabaMail
