I stole fire from the gods.
But I couldn't fence it. It was too hot.
The coffee shop kept samples of burnt coffee as evidence to fire their roaster.
It was used as grounds for dismissal.
If H20 is in the inside of a fire hydrant, what's on the outside ?
K9P.
I was fired from an insect repellent company for being dyslexic, so I smashed all their computers.
There’s no files on me.
I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers whether they would prefer “Smoking” or “Non-smoking”.
Apparently the correct terms are “Cremation” and “Burial”.
The other day I put out a big dangerous open fire!
The other people on the hot air balloon didn't appreciate me for some reason.
What did the chicken do when his shop caught on fire?
He egg-xited..
What did the water in the fire truck say when it came to a sudden stop?
I'm baffled.
My Dermatologist was fired today...
He made too many rash decisions.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
What is fire to a pyromaniac?
Just a warm-up.
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
My boss told me that he was going to fire the person with the worst posture
I have a hunch, it might be me.
I need to apologize to my fellow Californians for all the recent forest fires.
Apparently I'm the only one that could've prevented them
There was a fire at the yodeling school. Everyone was asked to exit in an orderly orderly orderly manner.
Mom told son to clean his room. But instead, he set it on fire.
It was a hot mess
My son and I went camping yesterday and when he asked me how to start a campfire, I explained, "You can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together, but make sure they’re the same..."
"Then you’ll have a match."
I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.
They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
I got fired from the unemployment office on Friday.
My boss said, “Clean out your desk, and I’ll see you in the office on Monday.”
Why did the forest ranger never put their tent between fires
because if they did the tents would be in a across fire
What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills ?
Bernadette.
Did you hear the was a fire at a used furniture store and two people died next door?
It was due the second hand smoke