I need to apologize to my fellow Californians for all the recent forest fires.
Apparently I'm the only one that could've prevented them
I stole fire from the gods.
But I couldn't fence it. It was too hot.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
What kind of fire moistens?
A humidifier.
What is fire to a pyromaniac?
Just a warm-up.
Did you hear the was a fire at a used furniture store and two people died next door?
It was due the second hand smoke
The other day I put out a big dangerous open fire!
The other people on the hot air balloon didn't appreciate me for some reason.
What do you call an 'O' on fire?
Flamingo.
Why did the forest ranger never put their tent between fires
because if they did the tents would be in a across fire
My Dermatologist was fired today...
He made too many rash decisions.
A butt lit a house on fire.
So I guess he committed Arse-on
I saw a cow on fire ther dayand so I put it out.
Guess you could call it a rare experience.
A french farmer who owned an olive plantation had a huge fire
He was extremely sad, he had lost his all his huile d'olive.
Most people have off on Independence Day. Except fire.
Fire-works on 4th of July.
Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
It was InTents.
Me: "Hello? 911? Emergency! The neighbors house is on fire!"
Dispatcher: "Did you discover the fire?"
Me: "No! Prometheus! but what does he have to do with this?"
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
I got fired from the unemployment office on Friday.
My boss said, “Clean out your desk, and I’ll see you in the office on Monday.”
There was a fire at the yodeling school. Everyone was asked to exit in an orderly orderly orderly manner.
My boss fired me.
"Why?" I asked.
He said, "You always question authority."
"How?"
Why was the food critic fired?
They didn't reference their sauces
What did the water in the fire truck say when it came to a sudden stop?
I'm baffled.
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