What does Avogadro put in his hot chocolate?
Marsh-mole-ows
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
Why did the acid go to the gym?
It wanted to become a buffer solution.
How did the blond define hydrophobic on her chemistry exam? Fear of utility bills.
I am out of chemistry jokes. I should zinc of a new one.
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
I keep making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.
What illness kept Avogadro in bed for two months?
Mole-onucleosis
What do you call an acid with attitude?
A meano-acid.
Why does Avogadro like Cindy Crawford?
She's his favorite super-mole-dle (and she has a mole).
A chemistry lab is like a big party.
Some drop the acid while others drop the base.
Who brings colorful eggs to chemist's kids every spring?
The Ether Bunny.
I'm fascinated by water's gas form.
It mist-ifies me.
What type of fish do two sodium atoms make?
2Na.
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
What did one tectonic plate say to the other when they bumped into each other?
Sorry, that was my fault.
Why was there only one Avogadro?
When they made him, they broke the moled.
What did Avogadro teach his students in math class?
Mole-tiplication
An instructor in chemical warfare asked soldiers in his class: "Anyone knows the formula for water?"
"Sure. That's easy," said one man.
"What is it?"
"H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O."
"What, what?" reasked the instructor.
"H to O," explained the chemistry expert.
Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?
Because he touched the beaker before it was cool.
If Iron Man and the Silver Surfer teamed up together, would they be alloys?
I like looking at a chart of all the chemical elements... periodically.
Oxygen went on a date with potassium last night.
It went OK.
What did one mole say to the other?
We have great chemistry together.
A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"
The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
Why did the military use acid?
To neutralize the enemy base.
What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?
Water-mole-ns
What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
It's getting hard to zinc of new science puns because so many of them argon.
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
"HeHe."
What kind of test do chemistry students like best?
Mole-tiple choice
Why don't they galvanize ships?
Because that would make them zinc.
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