What do you call a cab which provides drug therapy? Chemotaxis.
Ah! The element of surprise.
I can eat sugar with either hand, I'm ambidextrose.
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
What are mammoles?
Four-legged ani-moles
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared.
How did the blond define hydrophobic on her chemistry exam? Fear of utility bills.
Who brings colorful eggs to chemist's kids every spring?
The Ether Bunny.
What did Avogadro teach his students in math class?
Mole-tiplication
Why does Avogadro like Cindy Crawford?
She's his favorite super-mole-dle (and she has a mole).
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
"HeHe."
A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"
The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
Why couldn't the alpha helix say the alphabet?
Because it broke up every time it got to L-amino P.
What did one mole say to the other?
We have great chemistry together.
What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?
Water-mole-ns
I am out of chemistry jokes. I should zinc of a new one.
What do you get when you have a bunch of moles acting like idiots?
A bunch of mole-asses
How would you describe a stinky chemist?
Mole-odorous
How do you make a hormone? You don't pay her.
What illness kept Avogadro in bed for two months?
Mole-onucleosis
Oxygen went on a date with potassium last night.
It went OK.
When life gives you mold - make penicillin.
The optimist sees the glass half full.
The pessimist sees the glass half empty.
The chemist see the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state.
What did the generous mole say when people crashed his party?
The mole the merrier
What do you call an acid with attitude?
A meano-acid.
Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?
Because he touched the beaker before it was cool.
Why did the acid go to the gym?
It wanted to become a buffer solution.
When hydrogen got arrested they told him he had one phone call.
He replied: "Call who? I don't have a family!"
An electrolyte and a solvent are talking in jail.
Solvent: What are you in for?
Electrolyte: A salt charge.
What type of fish do two sodium atoms make?
2Na.
It's getting hard to zinc of new science puns because so many of them argon.
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