I am out of chemistry jokes. I should zinc of a new one.
When life gives you mold - make penicillin.
Why don't they galvanize ships?
Because that would make them zinc.
What did the generous mole say when people crashed his party?
The mole the merrier
If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.
When hydrogen got arrested they told him he had one phone call.
He replied: "Call who? I don't have a family!"
I like looking at a chart of all the chemical elements... periodically.
How do you make a hormone? You don't pay her.
What do you do with a sick chemist? You try to helium, and then you try to curium, but if all else fails, you gotta barium.
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
How rich is Avogadro?
He's a multi-mole-ionaire.
How would you describe a stinky chemist?
Mole-odorous
Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve noble gases here."
Helium doesn't react.
Wanna hear a pun about gold? AU!
Organic chemistry is really hard.
Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.
What type of fish do two sodium atoms make?
2Na.
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
I can eat sugar with either hand, I'm ambidextrose.
You know what's cool about chemistry?
Endothermic reactions.
When Miss Acid told her husband, Mr Alkali, she was pregnant...
He exploded with anger.
It wasn't the reaction she was hoping for.
Why couldn't the alpha helix say the alphabet?
Because it broke up every time it got to L-amino P.
The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared.
What are mammoles?
Four-legged ani-moles
What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
CSI.
Funny chemistry puns always get a good reaction.
It's getting hard to zinc of new science puns because so many of them argon.
What illness kept Avogadro in bed for two months?
Mole-onucleosis
Which tooth did Avogadro have pulled?
One of his mole-ars
What did Avogadro teach his students in math class?
Mole-tiplication
What kind of test do chemistry students like best?
Mole-tiple choice
Who brings colorful eggs to chemist's kids every spring?
The Ether Bunny.