The aspiring comedian has an unbe-leaf-able collection of autumn jokes, but they are all falling flat.
We've reached the point of snow return.
What’s the best meal to eat in an igloo?
Brr-eakfast!
Summer went swimmingly this year.
Hey summer, long time no sea!
The abdominal snowman is just a snowman with a six-pack.
Does February like March?
No, but April May.
I was at an office conference this past autumn. I made a new friend and when I asked for his contact details, he said, "Here is my November!"
What’s the freshest herb you can find in April?
Spring-thyme!
Autumn brings re-leaf from the heat.
What’s the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?
Seasoning.
How do Eskimos make their beds?
With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
What do you call a slow skier?
A slopepoke!
Why did Dracula take cold medicine in winter? To stop his coffin.
It was mitten in the stars.
Fall is a-maize-ing.
What did the turkey say after Thanksgiving dinner? I'm still stuffed.
What do you get from sitting on the snow too long?
Polaroids!
I was cracking some lame fall puns when my friend commented, "Gosh, you are acorny person!"
Reading whilst sunbathing? You must be well-red!
Did you see that all the snow and ice are melting?
I thaw!
It's a-boat time for a holiday!
Why do leaves change color in the fall? Because they want to leaf their old color.
What month does every tree dread? Sept-timmmberrr!
What's the best way to avoid eating too many Thanksgiving leftovers? Quit cold turkey.
Feeling cold? Go stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.
Do you know about April 1st?
Yes, I’m fooly aware of it!
If money really did grow on trees, what would be everyone’s favorite season? Fall.
What do you call the Halloween costume contest winner? Mummy of the year.
Water you doing, my friend?
What is the best breakfast cereal to eat in the winter?
Frosted Flakes!
What do you call a dollar bill frozen in ice?
Cold, hard cash!
An ig is just a snow house without a loo!
Where do math teachers normally like to go on summer vacation?
Times Square.
All you need is a little vitamin sea.
I snuggle to get through these winter days.
Why did the detectives suddenly appear at the concert at the beach?
Something fishy was going on.
See snow evil, hear snow evil.
You don’t like my winter pun? How cold!
Why is spring a great time to start a gardening business?
Because it’s the season when you can really rake in the cash.
Snow joke, the weather is horrible today!
What is the perfect day to go to the beach?
Sun-day!
Why do birds fly south in the fall?
Because it’s too far to walk.
How did the struggling leaf get the job? He got the right qua-leaf-ications.
Why didn’t the newlyweds plant any flowers this spring?
They were too busy planting kisses!
The baker taught his apprentice that to make a good pie one needs to bake it to pie-fection!
What did the man say after spending hours skiing?
"I'm starving, can I avalanche?"
What did the tree say to autumn? Leaf me alone.
What do you say when you are happy with how life has been weeks before Easter? It’s so far been an egg-cellent spring.
It’s Fall coming back to me now.
Go to BabaMail
