I tried to make a poo but could only squeeze out a p**.
I must be missing some bowels.
If you poop in your sleep...
You have sleep crapnea.
Dung Beetles know how to keep their sh** together.
I've stopped paying $6 for sham poo
After all, I make my own DIY genuine poo every morning.
If a clown farts...
Does it smell funny?
A zoo employee was injured when a monkey threw flaming poo at him.
He suffered from turd debris burns.
If you take a dump on a stump...
Does that make it a toilet tree?
Why didn’t the teacher want to fart in front of anyone?
He was a private tootor.
Do people have strange scents of humor if they laugh at their own farts?
When your poo goes into the sewers, it's not yours anymore.
It becomes pooblic domain.
What do you call coffee made from poo?
Crappuccino.
What type of poo smells good?
Shampoo.
Where do cow farts come from?
The dairy air.
Never fart in an apple store
They don't have windows.
A dung beetle spent an entire day rolling a ball of dung up a hill, only to have it fall down to the other side...
Needless to say, he lost his sh*t.
Where does Batman go to take a dump?
To the batroom of course!
Why did the baker go to the toilet?
Because he kneaded a poo.
Dung beetle walks into a bar....
"Is this stool taken?"
What do you get when you fart on your wallet?
Gas Money.
How do people take a dump when, well, nobody gives a s**t?
Why shouldn’t you fart on elevators?
It’s wrong on so many levels.
I was walking down the road and slipped on some dog poo. Someone came up behind me and slipped as well. Trying to sympathize, I said "I just did that!"
They slapped me and said "use the toilet next time"
Why did the painter take a dump on the floor?
It was the work of fart.
What do you call someone who acts like a piece of fish poop?
A bassturd.
Poo jokes...
Are funny sh**.
I was walking along when I saw a pile of dog sh** on the side of the street, a little further on I saw an identical one.
That was a crazy deja poo.
What do you call a person who starts their own cow poop business?
An entre-manure.
Why was the dung beetle mad at the store clerk?
Because the clerk sold him shampoo.
How would you call a tutle's poo?
Turdle.
I like telling fart jokes.
They are tough to hold in.
Scientists have just discovered a fossilized Dinosaur fart...
They say it’s a blast from the past!
What is a dung beetle's favorite holiday song?
"All I Want for Christmas is Poo"
A man walks into a zoo, there was only one animal in the zoo.
It was a Shitzu.
I’ve been going through a lot of sh** lately
I hate my job as a plumber.
I’ve been working on my poop art recently...
It’s pretty sh**.
what's the best day of the week to poop?
saTURDay.
What did the poop shoveler say when he quit his job?
"I'm dung with this sh*t!"
Cut a piece of poo into three pieces today.
Now I have turds.
All farts...are laughing gas.
What do you call a small turd?
A dumpling.
My farts don’t smell, they don’t have noses.
I found a side job collecting dog poo from people's yards.
It's not much, but business is picking up.
My wife is mad at me because I took a dump on the roof...
How can I wipe the slate clean?
What do you call a turd made by the captain of a vessel?
The Captain's Log
I was at the doctor, complaining about constipation. The doc seemed upset with me. He said,
"You don't give a s**t, do you?"
My friend explained how powerful (yet invisible) farts work via demonstration.
I was blown away by his transparency.
Why does no one react when the Queen farts?
Because it’s a Noble Gas!
"Is it the tar that smells like farts?"
"No, it was your asphalt"
What makes it okay for bats to just poop wherever they want?
For a bat, every room is the batroom.
You wanna know how I remember every poop I take?
I keep a log.
Go to BabaMail
