After letting elephant dung dry in the sun, it's nearly indestructible.
In fact, I'd say it's pretty heavy doody.
Why was the dung beetle mad at the store clerk?
Because the clerk sold him shampoo.
I've stopped paying $6 for sham poo
After all, I make my own DIY genuine poo every morning.
I couldn't tell if the dog truly had to poop or if he was just faking it to go outside.
Turns out he was full of s**t.
I was walking along when I saw a pile of dog sh** on the side of the street, a little further on I saw an identical one.
That was a crazy deja poo.
My wife is mad at me because I took a dump on the roof...
How can I wipe the slate clean?
A zoo employee was injured when a monkey threw flaming poo at him.
He suffered from turd debris burns.
How would you call a tutle's poo?
Turdle.
I’ve been going through a lot of sh** lately
I hate my job as a plumber.
I found a side job collecting dog poo from people's yards.
It's not much, but business is picking up.
What do you call a small turd?
A dumpling.
What did the poop shoveler say when he quit his job?
"I'm dung with this sh*t!"
What do you call coffee made from poo?
Crappuccino.
I always take a dump at 11:59 PM. That way, when the clock strikes midnight it’s the same sh**, different day.
What do you call a person who starts their own cow poop business?
An entre-manure.
How do people take a dump when, well, nobody gives a s**t?
Why did the baker go to the toilet?
Because he kneaded a poo.
I was at the doctor, complaining about constipation. The doc seemed upset with me. He said,
"You don't give a s**t, do you?"
In a recent study, NASA scientists confirmed that Uranus smells like farts.
This morning my daughter came to me, looking concerned. She said, “Dad, I need a new bum”.
I asked, “And why is that sweetheart?”
She said, “Because mine has a crack in it!”
Do people have strange scents of humor if they laugh at their own farts?
My farts don’t smell, they don’t have noses.
Why does no one react when the Queen farts?
Because it’s a Noble Gas!
A dung beetle spent an entire day rolling a ball of dung up a hill, only to have it fall down to the other side...
Needless to say, he lost his sh*t.
A man walks into a zoo, there was only one animal in the zoo.
It was a Shitzu.
I like telling fart jokes.
They are tough to hold in.
If you take a dump on a stump...
Does that make it a toilet tree?
When your poo goes into the sewers, it's not yours anymore.
It becomes pooblic domain.
what's the best day of the week to poop?
saTURDay.
Where do cow farts come from?
The dairy air.
I tried to make a poo but could only squeeze out a p**.
I must be missing some bowels.
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