What do you call a group of killer whales carrying musical instruments.
An orca-stra.
What do you call a police officer who plays the drums?
A beat cop.
Where did the music teacher leave her keys?
In the piano.
What is a garbage disposal’s favorite music group?
NSYNC.
What do you call a cow that plays the saxophone? A blues moo-sician.
How do you make a bandstand?
Take away their chairs.
What did the violin say when it finally played the music correctly?
Viola.
Silent Violin for Sale
No strings attached.
Follow Beethoven's example. People said he was never going to be a musician because he was deaf. Did he listen to them? Of course not.
I tried to play a bass guitar once.
It didn't make much sound, and it slipped out of my hands and swam away.
I re-skinned my drums with the skin my faithful steed Chestnut. I want people to reflect on the emotional connection between man and beast through the art of drum solos.
But my wife says I'm just beating a dead horse.
Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?
He was playing by ear.
Which composer likes tea the most?
Chai-kovsky.
Why couldn’t the athlete listen to her music?
Because she broke the record.
What do you call it when there are two nuns in a drum circle?
a conundrum
What kind of music do mummies listen to?
Wrap music.
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
What music are balloons scared of? Pop music
What instrument do English people play?
The Anglo-Saxophone!
My neighbors are listening to great music.
Whether they like it or not.
I bought my daughter into a radio...
She's not very e-static about it.
What did Beethoven say to Johann Sebastian when he was helping him parallel park?
“Bach it up.”
Which element is a member of famous rock band?
Hg
What do you call a pianist who throws trash everywhere?
Litterachi.
What do you call a group of orcas that play music?
An iPod.
Trumpester: Did you hear my last recital? Friend: I hope so.
Did you hear the Islamic music group who covered "I've Got You Babe?"
Sunni and Shia.
Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
Violinist Caught following a String of Robberies.
Why can’t skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
I found this amazing bluegrass band that does covers of 80s rock.
They call themselves Ban Jovi.
Did you hear about the new Smashing Pumpkins cover band?
They call themselves Squished Squash!
Why aren't high school twins afraid of getting mono?
Because they get stereo instead!
One of my ancestors was once hired by Henry VIII to teach his son to play the trumpet
He was a Tudor tooter tutor.
What do you get when you play New Age music backwards?
New Age music.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish.
I slapped my violin out of anger, then I got arrested for domestic violins.
What was stolen from the music store? The lute.
What is the musical part of a snake?
The scales.
You ever heard the Stormtrooper band?
Probably not, they've never had a hit.
I saw a Jazz band last night, but they really sucked...
They really saxophoned it in.
Don't you dare hit that drum again!
If you do, there will be repercussions!
The police came to arrest me after I tried to play my cat like a violin
They are charging me with Kitty Fiddling.
10 saxophone players blew up a theatre...
authorities are on the lookout for the tenorists.
What’s an avocado’s favorite music?
Guac ‘n’ roll.
What do you call a cow that plays the violin?
Moozart.
I used to be the triangle player in a Jamaican band but I had to quit....
It was always just one ting after another.
What's an owl's favorite rock band?
The Who
What concert costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Why was the piano laughing?
Because I was tickling his ivories
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