Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
What do you call a police officer who plays the drums?
A beat cop.
Me and my friends are in a band called “Duvet”.
We’re a cover band.
What’s a golf clubs favorite type of music?
Swing.
What does a trumpet and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.
My priest fired me from playing guitar with the choir.
Apparently it’s blasphemous to play a Gsus2 chord.
What did Jay-Z call his wife before they got married?
Feyonce.
All stereos are so typical.
What do you call someone that plays Tenor and Alto saxophone?
Bisaxual.
A friend of mine told me he’d give me a radio that had no batteries. I think it’s a wind-up.
Why was the square dance fiddler arrested for smuggling?
Because of his contra band...
My friend told me all about his friend's girlfriend who was playing saxophone.
Apparently she was a saxy lady.
Why was the piano laughing?
Because I was tickling his ivories
Want to start a Hula band that covers music by Poison.
Gonna call it Poi, Son.
Which genre of music appeals to most cheeses? R'n'Brie
Why did the Turkey want to join a band?
Because it had drumsticks!
Have you guys heard of the musical group called Cellophane?
They mostly wrap.
When I play my violin it always sounds like it's crying
It's must be too highly strung
Ringo, John snd George walked into an electric guitar shop...
They were less Paul.
Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.
What did the violin say when it finally played the music correctly?
Viola.
What's brown, lumpy, and sits on a piano bench?
Beethoven's Last Movement
Did you hear about the conductor who was arrested for inciting violins?
They strung him up, but he didn't fret.
Don't you dare hit that drum again!
If you do, there will be repercussions!
What did the LEFT Stereo Speaker say to the RIGHT, as he was being taken away for repairs
AUDIOS!
I had a job repairing 17th century violins...
I only fixed instruments that were BAROQUE.
Hear about the saxophone player who switched from a tenor to a soprano saxophone in the middle of the concert?
The press made quite a big deal out of his sax change.
Silent Violin for Sale
No strings attached.
What did the phone say to the radio when they met for a date?
This is AUXhilarating
I used to play triangle in a reggae band but I had to give it up. It was just one ting after another.
I re-skinned my drums with the skin my faithful steed Chestnut. I want people to reflect on the emotional connection between man and beast through the art of drum solos.
But my wife says I'm just beating a dead horse.
What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
I slapped my violin out of anger, then I got arrested for domestic violins.
Did you hear about the crook who was stealing guitars from classic rock stars?
He was just arrested for Petty theft.
Have you heard about the new band located in the north east of england?
They're called Durham Durham.
Did you hear the one about the pianist convention?
They had a few keynote speakers
What did the drummer name his twin daughters?
Anna one, Anna two...
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
Violinist Caught following a String of Robberies.
Why did the guitarist get fired as a carpenter?
He was shredding the floor.
How are trumpets like pirates?
They both murder in the high C’s.
My uncle was crushed by a piano...
His funeral was very low key.
Today, my pastor started talking to the drum set during his sermon.
Boy did I appreciate the cymbal-ism
How are pirates like trumpets?
They murder the high C’s!
What is Beethoven doing now?
De-composing.
How do you make a bandstand?
Take away their chairs.
What was the pianist doing at the mall?
Chopin.
I asked my musician friend if he plays by ear.
He said, "Yes, it's a violin. That is how you hold it."
What do you call a singing laptop?
A Dell.
Why can't Woody play his guitar?
He doesn't know where his Pixar.
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