German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
French, French Revolution
Can I go to France this year? Of Corsican!
Don’t make such a Dreyfus about it.
What's in the middle of Paris?
R.
Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.
It's a Languedoc.
France is beautiful in every Cezanne.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
I’ll try to keep it brief, but I have so much to Marseilles about France.
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
Whilst holidaying in France I saw a group of mushrooms performing Queen covers.
I said 'You're brilliant, what's the band called?'
They replied 'We are the Champignons."
Why can I not make jokes about the recent attacks in France?
Because jokes are all about execution.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
So I went to France and bought a house made of bread
I guess you could say I'm living in pain.
I tripped in France.
Eiffel over.
I’ve loved my vacation in France, but it’s time to Hugo.
What does a frog in Paris eat?
French Flies.
I guess I’m going to France
Because I have nothing Toulouse.
Why is the French Prime Minister never seen in the morning?
Becasue he is pm not am!
I always feel like a winner in France, which is great because I hate Toulouse.
What do they call the Hunger Games in France?
Battle Royale with Cheese.
Living in france must be hard
I mean, 100 dollars is only a cent.
We Rodin a taxi around the city after dark.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
France – it’s just a oui bit different!
Did you hear about the Frenchman who jumped into the river in Paris?
He was declared to be in Seine.
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to France from America?
Son, we are now Europeants!
It's only quarantine if it comes from the quarantine region of France;
otherwise, it's just sparkling isolation.
Another cheese factory in France exploded...
I Camembert to hear this joke again!
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
So you live in the seventh most populous city in France?
Must be Nice.
Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
It’s a beautiful Degas!
What are stepfathers called in France?
Faux pas.
Everyone knows the Italians invented pizza but few know that it was perfected by French rebels in nazi occupied France during WWII.
It was the pizza de resistance.
It’s impossible to Rouen a trip to France.
I’m in love with France, and I ain’t Lyon.
French people give me the crepes.
Why is research more trustworthy if it comes from France?
It's Pierre-reviewed.
When in France, I have Nantes-thing to complain about.
It’s time to say Versailles to France.
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
Can I be Candide with you?
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
Why should you never eat the fish in France?
Because it's poisson.
What is a female "Douchebag" in France called??
A douche-baguette.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
I can’t believe you have the de Gaulle to say that to my face.