How do Santa’s elves go to different floors in the North Pole toy workshop? They use the elf-avator!
We've all heard about elf on a shelf, but have you ever heard of troll on a poll?
What do elves eat for breakfast?
Snowflakes!
How many elves does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten! One to change the light bulb and nine to stand on each other's shoulders!
What kind of bread do elves use to make sandwiches?
Why shortbread of course!
What language do they teach at Elf School?
North Polish!
What kind of music do elves listen to?
Wrap music.
When the elves are clapping for their boss, we call it Santapplause.
Why did some of the elves spell Christmas as N-O-E? Because Santa said No L!
What do you call an elf who hasn’t had a date in two years or more?
Elf on the shelf.
What do you call an elf who steals Christmas present wrapping from the wealthy and gives it to the poor?
Ribbon Hood.
What kind of motorbike do elves ride to work?
A Holly Davidson!
What kind of pictures do elves love to paint?
Elf-portraits!
How do elves stay so skinny?
Elfy eating!
Why shouldn't you feed elves shellfish?
It makes them crabby!
Who did all this shopping? Me, my elf, and I!
Elves usually make fantastic listeners since they happen to be all ears.
"Santa’s pretty stelfy going down the chimney, don’t you think?" said one elf to another.
What kind of sandwich does Kissy the Elf like for lunch?
A wrap!
Whose music do elves like the most?
Elf-is Presley.
Where do elves go to get famous?
Holly-wood.
What type of elf has the most books?
A bookshelf.
What kind of money do elves always use?
Jingle bills!
What does Santa use after trimming his beard?
Elftershave.
What lives at the North Pole and is green, white, and red all over?
A sunburned elf!
What do they call a wild elf in Texas?
Gnome on the range!
What happens to elves who misbehave?
They get the sack.
"Don’t be elfish," said momma elf to her son. "Share with your sister."
Why did the dyslexic elf get fired?
He kept writing "From Satan" on children's New Year presents.
What’s the self-care mantra of elves after the holiday season ends?
“Treat yo’elf.”
What kind of elf lives in a soda can?
A Sprite!
Did you hear about the elf who was a little hard of hearing?
She had to keep saying "Sleigh, what?"
What do elves learn when they go to school?
The elf-abet.
Where do elves vote?
The North Poll.
If an elf can’t do something right now, how do they handle it?
Shelf it for later.
What did the elf tell its friends when they were traveling?
"Let’s take an elfie."
What do elves use in the kitchen when they are cooking?
Kitchen u-tinsels!
Why are elves so cold at Christmas?
Because it's in Decembrrrrr.
What kind of money do elves use?
Cold cash!
Why did the elf use a duck to wake him on Christmas morning?
So he could be up at the quack of dawn!
Did you hear about the new holistic elf doctor?
He's a gnome-opath!
Why did Santa stop smoking a pipe?
It was bad for his elf!
What do you call an elf that joins the 11 other elves in Santa’s workshop?
The twelf!
What happens if an elf catches you being naughty?
Yule be sorry!
What would you call an elf with lots of money?
W-elfy!
What did the mama elf say to her mischievous child?
“Stop elvesdropping on Santa!”
Where does an elf family stay when on vacation?
At a Ho-ho-ho-tel!
What goes inside elves’ pointy shoes?
Their mistletoes.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Elf
Elf who?
Elf me wrap this present!
Did you hear about the Elf booted from the chorus?
He couldn't Fa-la-la-la-long.