My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
What key on the keyboard is truly out of this world?
The spacebar.
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
Which keyboard shortcut doesn't work if you're incontinent?
Ctrl-P
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
Did you hear about the new WiFi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
My doctor must think I have a bad hard drive
He said he needed to C:
My kid asked why I named our WiFi "ship"?
But that's how everything syncs.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
The shark and the computer are so alike. They both have and use their megabytes.
Don't use the word "EGG" for your password...
It's very easily cracked.
My computer is so slow it's running in the '90s.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
A. GHOULgle!
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
Changed all my passwords to Kenny.
Now all I have are Kenny Loggins.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
What type of blood does a keyboard have?
Typo.
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
How big is a clown's hard drive?
50 GiggleBytes
Free Wifi!
Why? Was Mr. Wifi wrongfully accused or something?
How do trees get on a computer?
They just log in.
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
I had no one to help me when my computer and phone mutinied
I was left to my own devices.
What is a computer's favorite animal?
A RAM.
I got a asked to leave karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" seven times in a row. I had exceeded the allowed number of Loggins attempts.
What happens when you turn on a computer?
You turn it's floppy disk into a hard disk.
Why did the person throw their computer cabinet in the air?
They wanted to store it in the cloud.
Q. What happened when the computer geeks met?
A. It was love at first site!
Where do all the cool mice live? In their mousepads.
What made the computer so smart?
Because he listened to his motherboard!
It doesn't matter if my wife tells me Im not mature
Im not going to let her enter my tree house without the right password.
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
My dog ate my computer science homework.
It took him a couple of bytes.
Did you hear about the computer virus that was programmed by a cat?
It's considered meowware!
My computer's favorite singer is A Dell.
I joined a support group for former computer hackers.
Anonymous Anonymous.
I went into a bar with a keyboard under my arm. The barman said "Oi! We don"t want your typing in here".
Asked the librarian rather loudly for the wifi password. He said "Sshhhhhh!" I asked "is that all lower case?"
Why did the spider get on the computer?
To check his website.
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
Why did the computer parts salesman quit?
He lost his drive.
What happened to the plane run by a computer?
It crashed.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
Where do computers go to dance?
The disk-O.
Did you hear about the Wi-Fi wedding?
The ceremony was awful, but the reception was great!
So, if I heat my solid state hard drive until it becomes a gaseous state hard drive
Would that mean I'm doing cloud computing?
I was testing the speaker phone on the intercom on our landline with my father yesterday.
It started to make that annoying noise. My old man said it was too close to call.
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