How do lumberjacks shut down their computers?.
They log off.
My kid asked why I named our WiFi "ship"?
But that's how everything syncs.
Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?
He was missing the point.
What do you call a computer that plays tennis?
A server
What key on the keyboard is truly out of this world?
The spacebar.
Just can't get away from my broken keyboard. There's no escape.
I hate it when planes don't have free WiFi.
It drives me bored air line crazy.
I got a asked to leave karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" seven times in a row. I had exceeded the allowed number of Loggins attempts.
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
How do trees get on a computer?
They just log in.
Apparently Dracula sets up a password for every website so he can click on Your Account.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
Changed my password to fortnight but apparently that's two week.
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
Where do computers go to dance?
The disk-O.
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
What type of blood does a keyboard have?
Typo.
Why did the computer wear glasses?
To improve its web sight.
I joined a support group for former computer hackers.
Anonymous Anonymous.
*Creating password*
"MTWTFSS_MTWTFSS"
ERROR: [Password two week]
I told my boss, "Sorry I'm late. I was having computer issues."
Boss: Hard drive?
Me: No, the commute was fine. It's my laptop.
My computer became self aware and asked for a snack.
I replied, "Sorry I'm fresh out of computer chips."
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
Why can't an IT guy keep a girlfriend?
He turns them all off and on again.
My keyboard is missing a key. I lost ctrl.
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
My computer's favorite singer is A Dell.
In an attempt to deter computer hackers I've changed all my passwords to 'Brazil Nut'
That will be a hard one to crack.
Don't use the word "EGG" for your password...
It's very easily cracked.
Where are dead computer hackers buried?
In decrypt.
Why did the computer leave the restroom crying?
It said, "it hurts when IP."
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
I heard that starting next year, keyboards will no longer be sold with italics...
But it was a bold-faced lie.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
I hate hard drives...
...they byte
Playing the keyboard is...
my type of music.
Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
A. GHOULgle!
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
Where are dramatic hard drives from?
Oh I/O
Q. Why can't computers play tennis?
A. They try to surf the net.
What do you call a program that uses every possible combination to crack a password?
A battering R.A.M.
My computer is so slow it's running in the '90s.
Why was the computer sad?
It was going un-node-iced.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
Go to BabaMail
