Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
A. GHOULgle!
Changed my password to fortnight but apparently that's two week.
Asked the librarian rather loudly for the wifi password. He said "Sshhhhhh!" I asked "is that all lower case?"
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
Why did the man get so sad his computer had a virus?
It was a terminal illness.
Some guy asked dad for the WiFi code.
Shrugging his shoulders and giving a sympathetic look, he responded: I can't figure her out either.
Why did the computer leave the restroom crying?
It said, "it hurts when IP."
The oldest computer was an apple given to Adam and Eve back in paradise lost, but it came with very limited memory of just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
I asked the librarian for the new book on erectile dysfunction.
She typed on her keyboard and said "It's not coming up!"
I said "Yeah, that's the one!!"
My father got a new laptop, and it is now like the baby computer of the house, so we refer to the older laptop as the 'Data'.
I created a presentation on my computer but didn't use password protection...
Now it has visual aids.
I'm not like other keyboards...
I'm qwerty
My partner got mad when she found so much spam on my computer.
She said, "Food belongs on a plate!"
What do you call a program that uses every possible combination to crack a password?
A battering R.A.M.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None because it's a hardware issue.
My wifi password is the cat's birthday month
Feb-paw-hairy
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
I am really good with PowerPoint because I Excel at it.
A few punny Wifi names you can use:
Wi-Fight the Inevitable
Chance the Router
The LAN Before Time
Silence of the LAN
I Believe Wi Can Fi
The Password is...
Click Here to Download
Get off my LAN
Router? I Hardly Knew Her
Definitely Not Wifi
What do you get when you cross a computer with an elephant? Lots of memory!
V
V
Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working
Why did the computer come with airbags?
In case it crashed.
Just can't get away from my broken keyboard. There's no escape.
How big is a clown's hard drive?
50 GiggleBytes
Where do all the cool mice live? In their mousepads.
How does a computer learn something new?
Bit by bit.
What happens when you turn on a computer?
You turn it's floppy disk into a hard disk.
Clean water is like password
Not everyone has access to it.
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
Why did the hard drive crash?
Because it had a bad driver.
Keep Your Friends Close, Your Utility Keys Closer.
My father said that there was a bug on my computer. The bug was trying to eat one byte at a time.
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
A router and a modem got married.
They were pronounced husbandwidth and Wifi.
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
I introduced my mouse to my keyboard today...
It was awkward at first, but then they just clicked.
My computer was running pretty hot
Until I downloaded some fan art, and now it's working better.
Dear keyboard manufacturers, I'm writing to request a redesign so that g and t wouldn't be right next to each other. Retards
I used to store motivational quotes that I found online, onto the cloud, for whenever I needed some inspiration.
Unfortunately I forgot the password for my Google account.
I have no Drive.
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
I love complimentary WiFi.
It makes me feel good about myself.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
Q. How does a tree get on the computer?
A. It logs on!
What is the favorite snack of a programmer, it's undoubtedly Cadbury bytes.
Up until now, I always thought that all the cool mice would get together and live in my mousepad. Now when I know the truth, I feel quite broken.
I didn't know WiFi stood for Wireless Fidelity.
I guess I just didn't get the connection.
Why did the computer wear glasses?
To improve its web sight.
Go to BabaMail
