Do you know the band 1023 megabytes?
They haven't had a gig yet.
The computer wanted to get out of the house, so it used the Windows.
What made the computer so smart?
Because he listened to his motherboard!
My wifi password is the cat's birthday month
Feb-paw-hairy
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
Why are boy keyboards scared of girl keyboards?
They don't want to get qwerties.
Why did the computer crash?
It had a bad driver!
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
Keep Your Friends Close, Your Utility Keys Closer.
Why did the computer spy get fired?
She couldn't hack it.
People need to be careful about computers at all times because they byte.
Why did the computer parts salesman quit?
He lost his drive.
Why was the computer coughing?
It had a virus.
Q. How does a tree get on the computer?
A. It logs on!
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.
What do you get when you cross a computer with an elephant? Lots of memory!
My mom told me that sitting on a computer 8 hours a day in unhealthy
I said: But, mom that's why I am using a chair.
Q. What did the computer say to the cookie?
A. "Can I have your chocolate chip?"
Why did the spider get on the computer?
To check his website.
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
Q. What happened when the computer geeks met?
A. It was love at first site!
Hardcore programmers will agree that neither of them would use AC because they all prefer to open windows.
What's the tastiest part of a floppy disk?
The cookie!
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
My brother, who is an IT guy, got surgery done on his fingers. Now he can truly be called a tech-knuckle support guy.
When my father complained to my mother for never picking or dropping me at school, she looked at him and said, "You are the master of drag and drop, my love". He's an IT specialist...
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
My computer's favorite singer is A Dell.
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
Why do you need a password to make a camp fire?
So you can log in.
I introduced my mouse to my keyboard today...
It was awkward at first, but then they just clicked.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
Why do cats like computers the best?
Cuz they have a mouse.
My father said that there was a bug on my computer. The bug was trying to eat one byte at a time.
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
Why did the man get so sad his computer had a virus?
It was a terminal illness.
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
The oldest computer was an apple given to Adam and Eve back in paradise lost, but it came with very limited memory of just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
Why do microwaves always mess up WiFi...
...when every one I've tried creates hotspots?
Apparently my password needs to be capitals only so I've changed it to LONDONMADRIDROME.
Which keyboard shortcut doesn't work if you're incontinent?
Ctrl-P
What do Russians call a bad WiFi connection?
Inter-NIET
One day, I carried my laptop to the zoo because I wanted a RAM upgrade so I would have lots of memory when I came back.
I went into a bar with a keyboard under my arm. The barman said "Oi! We don"t want your typing in here".
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
On a keyboard, nothing is under control.
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