Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
Changed my password to fortnight but apparently that's two week.
Computers can be very good at golf because of their hard drives.
I was testing the speaker phone on the intercom on our landline with my father yesterday.
It started to make that annoying noise. My old man said it was too close to call.
It doesn't matter if my wife tells me Im not mature
Im not going to let her enter my tree house without the right password.
I named my phone "The Titanic" because it's always syncing.
My father got a new laptop, and it is now like the baby computer of the house, so we refer to the older laptop as the 'Data'.
I joined a support group for former computer hackers.
Anonymous Anonymous.
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"
Just can't get away from my broken keyboard. There's no escape.
Interesting that illegally copying on computers is known as piracy.
I suppose you CTRL C
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
What is it called when an IT person gets surgery on their fingers?
Tech knuckle support.
You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.
You just have to have cell coverage.
Did you hear about the new WiFi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
I can relate to my computer so much. Even I go to sleep after 25mins of inactivity.
Why did the person throw their computer cabinet in the air?
They wanted to store it in the cloud.
What did the girl say when she got a fake call? "I think that call was phoney".
*Creating password*
"MTWTFSS_MTWTFSS"
ERROR: [Password two week]
Do you know the band 1023 megabytes?
They haven't had a gig yet.
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
While I was driving, I saw another person driving while talking on his cell phone.
I got so mad, I threw my beer at him.
Why don't skeletons have a mobile? They don't have any body to talk to.
What key on the keyboard is truly out of this world?
The spacebar.
Computers cannot make good boxers because their bark is worse than their byte.
I left my phone under my pillow last night and woke up to coins underneath it. It must have been the Blue-tooth fairy.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
Apple is announcing a new cell phone for children.
iKid you not.
Why did the spider get on the computer?
To check his website.
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
...It was a close call.
How come an owl turns his cell phone off at night? So he doesn't get any hooty calls.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.
I had no one to help me when my computer and phone mutinied
I was left to my own devices.
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
Why do computers make such bad boxers?
Their bark is worse than their byte.
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
Why was the computer coughing?
It had a virus.
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
Where are dramatic hard drives from?
Oh I/O
My doctor must think I have a bad hard drive
He said he needed to C:
Why did the hard drive crash?
Because it had a bad driver.
My wife and I got married under a cell phone tower.
The ceremony wasn't great, but the reception was perfect.
What is a tiny cell phone called? A microphone.
Used to never be able to use the WiFi at my farm until I moved my router to the barn.
Now I have a stable connection.
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
Where do phones like to travel?
To the Great Call of China!
Today I Learned I should NOT have my password be the name of my cat.
I then turned to my cat and said, "Well, wJ:cg/v&A;6BTt, I guess it's back to the drawing board."
Go to BabaMail
