I took all the punctuation marks off of the judge's keyboard.
I expect a long sentence.
How come the mummy doesn't want a telephone? Because he always gets too wrapped up on his calls.
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"
And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
I visited a coffee shop where the Wifi password was wedonthavewifi.
It was a very frustrating conversation with the cashier.
*Creating password*
"MTWTFSS_MTWTFSS"
ERROR: [Password two week]
The computer said my password needed at least eight characters and at least one number, so I changed it to Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
What do you call a loud conversation? A megaphone.
Does your computer constantly and annoyingly have tons of updates to install?
Of course it does. Software needs to get better over a number of years and you can't rush the progress.
Chrome wasn't built in a day.
Why do microwaves always mess up WiFi...
...when every one I've tried creates hotspots?
Changed all my passwords to Kenny.
Now all I have are Kenny Loggins.
I went into a bar with a keyboard under my arm. The barman said "Oi! We don"t want your typing in here".
Why did the hard drive crash?
Because it had a bad driver.
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
One day, I carried my laptop to the zoo because I wanted a RAM upgrade so I would have lots of memory when I came back.
Free Wifi!
Why? Was Mr. Wifi wrongfully accused or something?
Interesting that illegally copying on computers is known as piracy.
I suppose you CTRL C
Cell phones are a static symbol.
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
If they could prove cell phones give deadly radiation
You could say to people you don't like "cant talk right now, you're giving me cancer".
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
You didn't hear the joke about cell phones?
Probably because it had a bad reception.
I wasn't making enough money as a keyboard percussionist so I started moonlighting as gun salesperson.
I go from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
While I was driving, I saw another person driving while talking on his cell phone.
I got so mad, I threw my beer at him.
What kind of phone does a burglar use?
A no-key-a.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
The shark and the computer are so alike. They both have and use their megabytes.
I almost had a predicament trying to call someone in the same room as me. It was a close call.
What did the baby computer call its father?
Data.
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
I created a presentation on my computer but didn't use password protection...
Now it has visual aids.
So, if I heat my solid state hard drive until it becomes a gaseous state hard drive
Would that mean I'm doing cloud computing?
Why did the telecommuter quit her job? Because talk is cheap.
Why do cats like computers the best?
Cuz they have a mouse.
Ever hear about the computer programmer who moved to Mexico?
He wanted to be a Señor developer.
I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home, honey, please put the coffee maker on." After a twenty-second pause, I asked, "You still there, sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she replied. "But I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now"
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
Hey baby, are you a cloud server?
Because I have something to upload from my hard drive.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
What did the eyewitness tell the cops after a computer robbed a bank?
It went data way!
How does the cell phone call his girlfriend on Valentine's Day? He gives her a ring.
Dancing Queen used to have a lot of profanity in its lyrics, but after computers became common
No-one needed an ABBA cuss
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
Where are dramatic hard drives from?
Oh I/O
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me a dinosaur, and handed me his iPhone.
The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!
Go to BabaMail
