How did the aliens hurt the farmer?
They trod on his corn.
I telephoned the tennis star Serena Williams for an interview and asked her, “What’s your favourite planet?”
Her: It’s Venus.
Me: Sorry Venus, would you put Serena on the phone?
Flat-Earthers hate the fact our planet is spherical, whereas Asgard is flat.
It's a Thor subject for them.
My daughter asked me, "Why are the two planets coming close together?"
"Well, you see... When two planets love each other they can come together in holy astro nomy."
If an astronaut steps on chewing gum then what will happen to him? He will simply be stuck on the Orbit.
What's E.T. short for?
Because he's got little legs.
There’s a big thunderstorm. The road is blocked by a big mudslide. A little boy asks his dad, “Why does earth fall down like that?”
His dad answers, “It’s terrain.”
Why will you not want to give a bath to the Saturn? It would then leave a ring around the tub.
Canada is planning a mission to the moon
They're calling the spaceship the Apollo-G.
Why did the police arrest the star? That’s becuase it was a shooting star.
Why does nobody invite Jupiter to the space parties? Because he has too much gas, always…
What will you call a crazy spaceman? An astronaut.
Why did the cow go right up to the spaceship? To see the Mooooooooooon.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Becoming a space pilot is not easy. It requires a good altitude.
Why do you think is the moon bald? Because it has no ‘air.
Reading sun puns while sunbathing make one well red.
Where do the astronauts park their vehicles? At the parking meteors.
How will you make the earth clean? By giving it a meteor shower.
Why do astronauts use linux?
because you can't open windows in space.
Why should the Sun get into a school? To get brighter.
How do astronauts prepare for a birthday party
They planet.
What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
What will a space turkey say to another one? Hubble Hubble.
I got an e-mail saying, "At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!" and I thought to myself...
“That’s just spam.”
How many ears do you think a Spock has? Three. A right ear, left ear, and a final front ear.
My wife will never forget falling asleep in the sun with her breast exposed.
It’s forever burned in her mammary.
How will you make a baby astronaut fall asleep peacefully? Rock-et.
Do you know what is the favorite key of the astronauts?
The Spacebar.
What do you call a person really crazy about the moon
A lunatic.
There's this vampire who's more powerful than any other, because he can't be hurt by the sun
All other vampires pale in comparison.
What are Astronauts doing when they do a mistake?
They Apollogize
How will you save yourself if you come across an aggressive alien? Give him some space.
Have you heard about the chef on space station? He’s not that much of an astronaut, but his food is literally out of this world!
People gave the sun a rating.
It was only one star.
I’m currently reading a book on anti-gravity and it’s impossible to put it down.
Which hot drinks space people like? Gravi-tea.
What do you think the boy star told the girl star? I really glow for you.
Old astronomers got so tired of waiting for the sun to go down, that they decided to pack it up and call it a day.
What kind of magazines would the planets prefer to read? Cosmos.
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