Why did some of the elves spell Christmas as N-O-E? Because Santa said No L!
Where does an elf family stay when on vacation?
At a Ho-ho-ho-tel!
Why did the Dragon Cross the Road?
He wanted to eat some chicken.
Why cant a dwarf be depressed?
Because they are compressed.
What do gnomes use to guard their mazes?
Minitaurs.
A fairy appears in front of an old man.
"For the good things you've done in your life, I grant you three wishes!"
The old man squints and asks: "Can you speak up a bit? My hearing isn't the best anymore..."
The fairy replies: "SURE! YOU HAVE TWO WISHES!"
We've all heard about elf on a shelf, but have you ever heard of troll on a poll?
Why do gnomes make such great secretaries?
Because they’re good at shorthand.
Did you know that unicorns live in New York City? I swear why do you think their called uNYCorns?
Why do interns make the best Dungeons and Dragons players?
They do it for the Experience.
What do pixies use to clean their teeth?
Fairy floss.
What does a mermaid say when she was leaving the party?
- Sea ya later.
What did the Little Mermaid say to Triton before she left?
- If you need me, call me on my shell.
Six out of seven dwarfs aren’t Happy.
Long time no sea.
Why are gnomes friends with dolls?
They like to share clothes.
When the elves are clapping for their boss, we call it Santapplause.
Uni-corn? I though that’s what you call a single grain or maize.
What do gnomes love to sing at Christmas?
We're driving gnome for Christmas.'
What happens to elves who misbehave?
They get the sack.
Shell-abrate the good times!
Mermaids always drink mermosas.
What type of elf has the most books?
A bookshelf.
Gnomes can be quite annoying when they’re indecisive. All they say is yes, gnome, maybe.
What lives at the North Pole and is green, white, and red all over?
A sunburned elf!
There was an exotic pet race to take place.
Adam brought an iguana. "Hes big and fast so hes sure to win!"
Daniel brought a komodo dragon. "He can go really fast when theres a treat for him at the end!"
John brought a leopard gecko. "Hes small but does his best!"
The bets were placed, the race took place and Johns leopard gecko won. When asked after the race how they felt his competitors had only one thing to say:
"Sure no surprises there. We knew he was going to win from the gecko."
What kind of bread do elves use to make sandwiches?
Why shortbread of course!
Too bad, if only I’d gnome!
Did you hear about the misguided unicorn lumberjack who was killing humans? He believed he was doing random axe of kindness.
What would you call an elf with lots of money?
W-elfy!
Go big or go gnome.
What do you call a fairy that doesn’t like to shower?
Stinkerbell.
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