“Why did they ask the turkey to join the band? He had the drum sticks.”
I call the shots.
You’re the cutest clover in the patch.
Saw what I thought was a large dog coloring Easter eggs.
Turned out to be a dyer wolf.
Have your elf a merry little Christmas.
I’m Dublin down on what I said before.
I’ll never fir-get.
“Elves are always defending the shape of their ears. They make some good points.”
Easter is grammatically incorrect.
We should say more east.
"Oh, I wanna dance with some bunny, with some bunny who loves me."
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
It's lit.
Take off all your cloves.
"You round me out." — High Card Band
"You make me egg-static."
“Dachshund Through the Snow.”
Reindeer don't go to school—they're elf taught.
Ireland you money, if you’ll pay me back.
"I've found some bunny to love."
I whale always love you.
I'd catalog you with the cookbooks because you look delicious.
How does the Easter bunny stay in shape?
Lots of eggs-ercise!
Are you a drum? Because my heart beats for you.
If it ain’t brogue, don’t fix it.
“Santa owes a lot to his little helpers. You might say he’s an elf-made man.”
What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?
A rebel without a Claus!
A round of Santa-plause, please.
What did one lightbulb say to the other lightbulb on Valentine’s Day?
I love you watts.
I’m fondue you.
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinselitis!
Are you a flame? Because I think I found my perfect match.
Why shouldn't you mess with Santa? Because he has a black belt.
It's ice to meet you.
I just want to say, “I love brew.”
Easter and April Fools fall on the same day this year...
You could say it only happens once in a blue moon.
“Someone’s barking up the wrong Christmas tree.”
You must be a geologist because you rock my world.
Are you an alien? Because I believe you’ve abducted my heart.
Don’t give into beer pressure.
Dublin over in laughter.
Irish you a whole pot of gold!
It takes one to snow one.
I'm Claus-trophobic.
I only have ice for you.
My wife says she wants to order a glass of wine during our Valentine’s Day dinner.
She says she loves being carded.
I’m feelin’ pine.
We’ve made a jig mistake, don’t you a-green?
You’re the queen of my heart.
Your shirt must be made out of husband material.
I asked the older woman at work what she is doing for Valentine’s Day and she said that she was taking her husband to the Cardiologist. The heart wants what the heart wants.
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