Thank you for making our relationship sweet rather than a rocky road.
Reindeer don't go to school—they're elf taught.
Let’s take an elfie.
What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?
A rebel without a Claus!
What does Santa bring naughty boys and girls on Christmas Eve? A pack of batteries with a note saying "toy not included".
"You might not carrot all, but you're irresistible."
Do you beer-lieve in magic?
Fir sure.
What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.
I’ll never fir-get.
You better beer-live it!
"I would hop to the end of the world for you."
I went to an Easter party as a Jesus cosplayer
I told them I was a crossplayer.
What do you call a fake Irish stone? A shamrock.
"Happy Easter to all my peeps."
“Remember: don’t eat the yellow snow.”
What is Santa's favorite breakfast food? Snow-flakes.
Are you a thief? Because you stole my heart.
Your sweater must be made out of wife material.
You shamrock my world.
We’ve got serious chemistry.
What did the arsonist do on Valentine's day?
He met his match.
How does santa get his Reindeer to fly? He uses Red Bull because it gives you wings!
Can’t pinch this.
You are spud-tacular.
Every piece of you is sweet.
How do the elves clean Santa's sleigh on the day after Christmas? They use Santa-tizer!
I think I found my perfect match
I aorta tell you how much I love you.
I just want to say, “I love brew.”
I call the shots.
This year for Valentine's day I got my wife the ace of hearts and packets of corn flour, rice flour and self raising flour
She wasn't happy. Apparently it wasn't what she meant when she said she just wanted a card and flowers.
"I'm eggs-hausted."
“Santa Claus’ favorite swimming spot is the North Pool.”
This Valentine's day, I decided to pay extra and buy flowers that look after themselves.
They are Self Raising.
What did the mountain say to the hill on Valentine's day?
You make my heart gush, I lava you.
Our love started with a Hershey’s Kiss.
"Eggs love you."
Treat yo'elf.
Love at frost sight!
The pint’s the limit.
Shamrocks and shenanigans for all!
“What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? It’s Christmas, Eve!”
"You round me out." — High Card Band
I asked the older woman at work what she is doing for Valentine’s Day and she said that she was taking her husband to the Cardiologist. The heart wants what the heart wants.
Who’s ready to party their shamrocks off?
What do you call Santa living at the South Pole? A lost clause.
How does an elf get to Santa's workshop? By icicle.
It ain’t over till it’s clover.
Dublin over in laughter.