I used to hate facial hair...
But then it grew on me.
I hate it when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.
A bald man walks into the Hair Club. “I’d like to buy a hair piece if the price is right.”
Hair Club Salesperson: “Well sir, how much do you want toupee?”
Why does James Bond Have grey hair?
Because there's no time to dye!
What kind of hair explodes?
Bangs.
I gave my wife a broken hair-dryer for her birthday
She wasn’t blown away.
How does a hairdresser stop themselves from cutting their own hair?
By sheer will.
Why don’t orcas have hair?
They have whale pattern baldness.
If Satan ever lost his hair...
There would be hell toupee.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
My wife claims that she can wax my chest hair without me feeling any pain at all.
I don’t think she’ll be able to pull it off.
I was going to shave my face but my razor was blunt.
It said, "You look ugly without a beard."
What helps a pirates hair grow?
Aaarrrgan oil.
What's a bee's favorite hairstyle?
A buzz cut.
What hairstyle did Moses get at the hairdressers?
A middle parting.
Why doesn't the moon shave?
Because it waxes.
My daughter asked me if I could put her hair in a bun. I said...
“I could but I think the baker might object”.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
My friend went bald years ago, but still carries his old comb with him.
He just can’t part with it.
What does a bee use to brush it's hair ?
A Honeycomb.
Why is Pavlov's hair so soft?
Because he conditions it.
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