How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honey combs!
Not everyone looks good with a wig
But I think you could really pull it off.
What's a bee's favorite hairstyle?
A buzz cut.
What do you call it when you have proof that you bought a wig?
A receipting hairline
What kind of hair explodes?
Bangs.
My wife claims that she can wax my chest hair without me feeling any pain at all.
I don’t think she’ll be able to pull it off.
I mustache you a question..
but I'll shave it for later.
I was going to shave my face but my razor was blunt.
It said, "You look ugly without a beard."
I used to hate facial hair...
But then it grew on me.
My wife hates the colour of her hair...
She's dyeing to change it.
Why does Bruce Wayne have such fabulous hair?
He uses conditioner Gordon.
What does a bee use to brush it's hair ?
A Honeycomb.
If Satan ever lost his hair...
There would be hell toupee.
Several years ago, I lost all my hair. Yes, I'm bald. But, I still keep my comb. I bring it with me everywhere still.
I just can't part with it.
What do you call somebody who's addicted to trimming hair?
A clipptomaniac!
What does Satan shave with?
A hell razor.
Did you get a hair cut?
No, I got them all cut.
What is a butchers favorite facial hair style?
Mutton chops.
My friends tell me I'm like a beard..
I grow down or sideways, but I never grow up!
I bought a wig for my wife, at a discount store...
Didn't want toupee full price.
I bought a wig for a dollar...
It was a small price toupee.
"I like a man that can pull off facial hair."
I think your supposed to use a razor.
I grew facial hair without telling anyone.
It's my secret 'stache.
What does a funeral home hair stylist handle on a daily basis?
A brush with death
Why did dad shave his daughters barbie?
She wanted 100 doll hairs.
My executive assistant has long hair.
I call him my mane man.
My mother-in-law never taught my wife to shave her legs without getting cut.
She didn’t razor right.
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Where do sheep go to get their hair cut?
The baa-baa shop.
Why don’t orcas have hair?
They have whale pattern baldness.
What do you call a group of guys waiting to get their hair cut?
A Barbecue.
Another term for hair that's tied up in a bun is
a hairball
What do you call James Bond with no beard ?
Agent Zero Zero Shaven.
What’s the name of the Grim Reapers hair salon?
Curl up and dye.
How does a lumberjack trim his beard?
With a chinsaw.
How did Pavlov get such great hair?
He conditioned it.
My daughter asked me if I could put her hair in a bun. I said...
“I could but I think the baker might object”.
Right, I'm off to grow some facial hair above my top lip...
Must dash.
When she saw her first strands of gray hair...
She thought she would dye.
My wife, whilst trying to brush my son's hair, told him he was having a bad hair day.
My son replied, "Oh, is it being knotty?"
Why is Pavlov's hair so soft?
Because he conditions it.
A bald man walks into the Hair Club. “I’d like to buy a hair piece if the price is right.”
Hair Club Salesperson: “Well sir, how much do you want toupee?”
What helps a pirates hair grow?
Aaarrrgan oil.
What do ghosts use to wash their hair?
Shamboo.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Someone put LSD in my hair gel
My hair has been spiked!
It took me forever to figure out where my mustache went.
Turns out, it was right under my nose the whole time.
What’s orange with bad hair and hears ‘boo’ a lot?
A haunted pumpkin with a wig.
What hairstyle did Moses get at the hairdressers?
A middle parting.
I told my son that I wash my hair with poo but I lied.
It’s not real poo, it’s a sham poo.
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