Here's looking at Eye Puns, Kid.

Eye drops are technically blinker fluid.
Did you know there is a new horse species with one eye and a horn?
It's called a unicornea.
Bad puns are how eye roll.
I've been trying to sleep with one eye open lately, but it's really hard
Last night I couldn't sleep a wink
What do you call an eye specialist with a short shirt?
A crop-toptometrist
I got some salt in my eye
Now it’s see salt.
My eye doctor’s office is at the shopping mall.
She’s an Opthemallogist.
I can cut a piece of wood with my own eyes just by looking at it
It's true, I saw it with my own eyes.
I've got 4 eyes, 3 legs, 1 tail, and 12 toes. What am I?
A liar.
Called in sick to work one day complaining about my eyes.
When they asked what's wrong I said:
“I just can’t see myself coming in to work today.”
What do you call an eye that can fly?
A real eye soar.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye deer.
As I handed my dad his 50th birthday card, he looked at me with tears in his eyes and said
"You know, one would have been enough."
I saw my neighbor, slumped over his lawnmower, crying his eyes out.
I think he’s going through a rough patch.
My New Years resolution for next year will be to finally get that laser eye surgery I’ve always wanted
It’s my 2020 vision
I saw a movie about a pig with no eyes.
It was PG.
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye
Turns out she was seeing someone else.
I just saw a cashier scan the eyes of a rude customer with her barcode reader.
The look on his face was priceless.
A man is holding a bee, what is in his eye?
I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes.
Now I have Heinzsight.
What do you call a pig with three eyes?
What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between you and me, something smells.
This eye pun couldn't be any cornea.