Nothing really mattress.
I stubbed my toe onto a piece of furniture. C-ouch!
I think a couch can endure many things, but if you take off its cushions, it would make it uncomfortable.
What would a self deprecating wardrobe say?
"I hate my-shelf"
What do you call an artistic piece of furniture?
A drawer
There's a group of guys that assemble wooden furniture for fun.
I hope they let me join.
Why is IKEA the cheapest place to get furniture?
Because they have some Swede deals!
I was going to replace the seats at my bar
But... I just can't look at another stool sample
I accidentally kicked my bed post when I got up this morning, almost couldn't move!
Luckilly, I called a toe truck.
A student made our teacher so angry, they flipped their desk
Oh, the tables have turned
Why does your laptop have a blanket on it?
It's on sleep mode.
I put a blanket on a small pepper
He said he felt a little chili
What did the flirty coat say to the jacket?
"Do you hang here often?"
Why did the broom decide to go to bed?
He was getting sweepy
What’s a farmer’s favorite piece of furniture?
a COWch.
Why did the bicycle go to bed early?
Because it was two-tyred
I'm thinking about buying a weighted blanket.
This is a most heavy decision.
How do you move a piece of furniture at the weather station?
With four casters.
What do you do when you are in the wrong seat?
Stand corrected
I had a few doubts about buying a big metal cabinet to store all my valuables.
Turns out... it was a safe purchase.
I thought I won the argument with my wife as to how to arrange the dining room furniture... But when I got home, the tables were turned
I'm studying the meaning of couches in different parts of the world.
It's really PhillySOFAcal.
It was my first attempt at repairing my wobbly picnic table.
I totally nailed it.
What’s Irish and stays outside all year?
Patty O’Furniture
I've come up with a list of the top 10 types of specialized chairs.
Number 3 will shock you
My wife chose a new dining table with a metal frame instead of a wooden one
I complimented her on picking an unteak.
Which noble man loves sitting at a round table?
Sir Cumference
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
Oh Sheet
What happens when a closet goes into fighting?
It turns into a wardrobe.
I wanted to buy a book on Albert Einstein's theories but it was on the top shelf...
It's information that's way over my head.
What does a couch say to another couch at the other side of the room?
We are sofa apart!
I tried to build myself an armchair, but I messed up some of the measurements and made it too wide.
So near, and yet sofa
My office chair broke. It’s letting me down.
My husband hated my impulse purchase of a revolving chair, but then he sat on it.
Eventually he came around.
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and thinking to myself....
Where the heck is my roof ?
I woke up in the middle of the night and found all the blankets on my bed were missing.
I was scared sheetless.
When I heard my sofa had been stolen, I thought “I’m not going to take this sitting down”.
Someone took my three-legged chair.
I guess it was stoolen
Remind me not to get into another pillow fight... the risk for a concushion is too big.
What did the first plate say to the second plate?
"Dinner's on me!"
Go to BabaMail
