Why can I not make jokes about the recent attacks in France?
Because jokes are all about execution.
Why should you never eat the fish in France?
Because it's poisson.
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
Living in france must be hard
I mean, 100 dollars is only a cent.
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
Can I go to France this year? Of Corsican!
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
I can’t believe you have the de Gaulle to say that to my face.
France is beautiful in every Cezanne.
French fries aren’t cooked in France
They’re cooked in greece.
Which city in France is the nicest?
Nice.
What do France and a pigeon have in common?
Every 5 minutes, there is a coo.
Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.
It's a Languedoc.
I’ll try to keep it brief, but I have so much to Marseilles about France.
What does a frog in Paris eat?
French Flies.
Did you hear about the Frenchman who jumped into the river in Paris?
He was declared to be in Seine.
I tripped in France.
Eiffel over.
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
I always feel like a winner in France, which is great because I hate Toulouse.
Whilst holidaying in France I saw a group of mushrooms performing Queen covers.
I said 'You're brilliant, what's the band called?'
They replied 'We are the Champignons."
What is a female "Douchebag" in France called??
A douche-baguette.
Everyone knows the Italians invented pizza but few know that it was perfected by French rebels in nazi occupied France during WWII.
It was the pizza de resistance.
Are these pants too tight in the Balzac?
From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera!
I’m in such a Henri to get to France!
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
Can I be Candide with you?
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to France from America?
Son, we are now Europeants!
French history is nothing to Lafayette at.
What do they call the Hunger Games in France?
Battle Royale with Cheese.
What’s the capital of France?
The F.
I used to be a personal driver in France
But now I have nothing to chauffeur it.
So I went to France and bought a house made of bread
I guess you could say I'm living in pain.
French, French Revolution
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