So you live in the seventh most populous city in France?
Must be Nice.
It’s impossible to Rouen a trip to France.
Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.
It's a Languedoc.
Why can I not make jokes about the recent attacks in France?
Because jokes are all about execution.
It’s a beautiful Degas!
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
I guess I’m going to France
Because I have nothing Toulouse.
I’ll try to keep it brief, but I have so much to Marseilles about France.
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to France from America?
Son, we are now Europeants!
What does a frog in Paris eat?
French Flies.
I hate to Gauguin, but I have to catch my flight.
What’s Austrian and took over France?
Croissants.
Don’t make such a Dreyfus about it.
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
What do France and a pigeon have in common?
Every 5 minutes, there is a coo.
What are stepfathers called in France?
Faux pas.
I always feel like a winner in France, which is great because I hate Toulouse.
I’ve loved my vacation in France, but it’s time to Hugo.
Which city in France is the nicest?
Nice.
Don’t come to France without any Monet.
How do you Charlemange-age to get through the last few days before vacation?
We Rodin a taxi around the city after dark.
Can I be Candide with you?
Why is the French Prime Minister never seen in the morning?
Becasue he is pm not am!
I used to be a personal driver in France
But now I have nothing to chauffeur it.
Did you hear about the Frenchman who jumped into the river in Paris?
He was declared to be in Seine.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
What do they call the Hunger Games in France?
Battle Royale with Cheese.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
French fries aren’t cooked in France
They’re cooked in greece.
Living in france must be hard
I mean, 100 dollars is only a cent.
French people give me the crepes.
What is a female "Douchebag" in France called??
A douche-baguette.
Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
It's only quarantine if it comes from the quarantine region of France;
otherwise, it's just sparkling isolation.
Another cheese factory in France exploded...
I Camembert to hear this joke again!
Can I go to France this year? Of Corsican!
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera!
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
French, French Revolution
What’s the capital of France?
The F.
Everyone knows the Italians invented pizza but few know that it was perfected by French rebels in nazi occupied France during WWII.
It was the pizza de resistance.
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
Whilst holidaying in France I saw a group of mushrooms performing Queen covers.
I said 'You're brilliant, what's the band called?'
They replied 'We are the Champignons."
I’m in love with France, and I ain’t Lyon.
If you were born and raised in France, what does that make you?
French bred.
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