Why are elves so cold at Christmas?
Because it's in Decembrrrrr.
What kind of money do elves use?
Cold cash!
What did the mama elf say to her mischievous child?
“Stop elvesdropping on Santa!”
"Don’t be elfish," said momma elf to her son. "Share with your sister."
What kind of sandwich does Kissy the Elf like for lunch?
A wrap!
Why did the elf use a duck to wake him on Christmas morning?
So he could be up at the quack of dawn!
What do you call an elf that joins the 11 other elves in Santa’s workshop?
The twelf!
Why do Santa’s helpers go to therapy?
To help their elf esteem.
Who did all this shopping? Me, my elf, and I!
What do you call an elf who won’t share?
Elfish.
What would you call an elf with lots of money?
W-elfy!
Where do elves go to get famous?
Holly-wood.
What did the elf tell its friends when they were traveling?
"Let’s take an elfie."
If an elf can’t do something right now, how do they handle it?
Shelf it for later.
Where does an elf family stay when on vacation?
At a Ho-ho-ho-tel!
Where do elves vote?
The North Poll.
What do you call an elf who hasn’t had a date in two years or more?
Elf on the shelf.
Why did the dyslexic elf get fired?
He kept writing "From Satan" on children's New Year presents.
We've all heard about elf on a shelf, but have you ever heard of troll on a poll?
What kind of motorbike do elves ride to work?
A Holly Davidson!
What is an elf’s favorite band?
The Pixies.
What type of elf has the most books?
A bookshelf.
When the elves are clapping for their boss, we call it Santapplause.
"Santa’s pretty stelfy going down the chimney, don’t you think?" said one elf to another.
What do elves learn when they go to school?
The elf-abet.