Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
A company from Israel took over the Greek national cheese factory in Greece
Now it's called the Cheeses of Nazareth.
I like to say mucho when i’m talking to my Spanish speaking friends.
It means a lot to them.
France – it’s just a oui bit different!
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
A lot of William Shakespeare’s plays were based off of old Greek and Roman performances
That's playgarism if you ask me.
Half of Italy is complaining about the coronavirus and the other half is laughing not taking it seriously.
All they do is cheese and wine.
Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
I've been dying to go to Greece on vacation.
But all they serve is bar food.
French fries aren’t cooked in France
They’re cooked in greece.
Everyone knows the Italians invented pizza but few know that it was perfected by French rebels in nazi occupied France during WWII.
It was the pizza de resistance.
French, French Revolution
It’s time to say Versailles to France.
French people give me the crepes.
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
How come there are no automatic cars in Spain?
They’re all Manuel.
What did the Spanish fireman call his two sons?
José and Hose-B.
When in France, I have Nantes-thing to complain about.
We Rodin a taxi around the city after dark.
Other people had drugs in school, but I brought Greek cheeses.
That way I could have math and feta cheese.
Me and my friend were going to a costume party. He told me he was coming as a small island off the coast of Italy.
I said don’t be Sicily.
From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera!
I visited Spain and couldn't stop looking at the architecture
It was very Moorish.
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.
There's a new film out about two insects that meet in Italy.
It's Rome ants.
Took a tour of Pisa, Italy...
Tour guide said “Hello, my name is Eileen.”
I hate to Gauguin, but I have to catch my flight.
I tripped in France.
Eiffel over.
Which ancient Greek Philosopher had a foot fetish?
Play-toe.
Or was it Sock-rates?
I’ve loved my vacation in France, but it’s time to Hugo.
If you want to vacation in Italy, don't be afraid to Rome around.
Did you hear about the watchmaker who is half Spanish and half Irish?
His name is Juan O'Clock.
Who is the most famous actor in Greece ?
John Travolta.
I asked my Italian grandfather if the rougher parts of Italy were called the spaghetto.
His look was pasty.
So there’s this Spanish magician. His main trick was performing a spectacular vanishing act. He said that he’d vanish on the count of three. “Uno” “Dos”
And then he vanished, without a tres.
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
I was at a thrift store and the guy ahead of me was purchasing an antique urn made in Greece
He asked the cashier if she knew how much a Greek urns.
Have you heard of the tallest tower in France?
It’s a real Eiffel.
The Leaning Tower of Pisa is in Italy
So it’s italicized!
I went to Spain to attend the Running of the Bulls, but when I arrived, there was nothing there but cows with fake horns attached.
I was in shambles.
What’s Austrian and took over France?
Croissants.
If Russia attacked Turkey from behind do you think Greece would help?
If I were to wander around in Italy...
Would I be roamin'?
What did the prehistoric Greeks call their goddess of love?
Troglodite.
My son asked today “ Dad, are people in Spain cannibals?”
I answered “Why would you think that?”
He said “Well, my teacher said they mostly live off of tourists there.”
A few years ago, I had a job translating pre-Classical Greek literature into Braille.
It feels like ancient history.
What do France and a pigeon have in common?
Every 5 minutes, there is a coo.
What do you call a cat from Italy?
Spacatti.
I'll be making a movie about the Greek alphabets.
It's a Psi Phi film.
It’s impossible to Rouen a trip to France.
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