I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain.... to Parcelona...
He didn't laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.
What did Sophocles call his dating service in Ancient Greece?
Oedipal Arrangements.
I like to say mucho when i’m talking to my Spanish speaking friends.
It means a lot to them.
French history is nothing to Lafayette at.
What is the call of a Spanish speaking owl?
Quién...Quién.
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
What happens when Greeks come back from war?
They get a gyro’s welcome.
What do they call the Hunger Games in France?
Battle Royale with Cheese.
I’ll try to keep it brief, but I have so much to Marseilles about France.
Don’t come to France without any Monet.
What do you call a cat from Italy?
Spacatti.
A soda can, a gas tank and the Greek god Eros walked into a bar?
The bartender shook his head, “Here comes trouble.” A patron at the bar said, “What’s wrong?” The bartender replied, “Those guys get together and they become cantankeros.”
My son asked today “ Dad, are people in Spain cannibals?”
I answered “Why would you think that?”
He said “Well, my teacher said they mostly live off of tourists there.”
Historians have discovered a new Greek God who didn’t excel at anything.
His name was mediocretese.
How do cats say goodbye in Italy?
Miao.
What is the capital of Greece?
G.
What does a Greek machine need to work?
Greece.
I was at a thrift store and the guy ahead of me was purchasing an antique urn made in Greece
He asked the cashier if she knew how much a Greek urns.
I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
Everyone knows the Italians invented pizza but few know that it was perfected by French rebels in nazi occupied France during WWII.
It was the pizza de resistance.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
If you want to vacation in Italy, don't be afraid to Rome around.
It wasn't til I studied Spanish as an adult that learned Spain discovered Canada.
As our teacher explained it, the first maps said "Acá, nada."
I bought a 400 year-old chair from Italy,
but as soon as I sat on it, it baroque.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
Why do people in Greece not wake up until noon?
Because Dawn is tough on greece.
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.
If Russia attacked Turkey from behind do you think Greece would help?
What are stepfathers called in France?
Faux pas.
When in France, I have Nantes-thing to complain about.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
What does a frog in Paris eat?
French Flies.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
I guess you can say my misunderstanding of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles
Elbow.
Why does it take so long for the EU to figure out how much Italy owes them every year?
Hey, ease up. Rome wasn't billed in a day.
Took a tour of Pisa, Italy...
Tour guide said “Hello, my name is Eileen.”
Recently, i started learning Spanish
But i can't hola long conversation.
An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants.
‘’Euripides’’ says the tailor. ‘’Yeah, Eumenides?’’ replies the man.
What language do they speak in Italy
Times New Roman.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
I tripped in France.
Eiffel over.
My uncle moved to Spain to sing on stage by night and sell UPVC windows by day. He changed his name to....
Enrique Doubleglazius.
You heard about the Spanish woman that is now a man?
He’s called Senor Rita.
What do you call a sneezing big foot in Spanish?
Achoopacabra.
What sound does a Greek cow make?
"μ"
Vasco de Balboa told the Queen of Spain, “I discovered a large body of water on my journey.”
She said, “Could you be a little more pacific?”
What do you call the Greek version of Spider-Man?
Pita Parker.
Son: I was really Hungary and I ate the whole Turkey. There is only Greece left.
Me: I couldn’t Bolivia!
What do pups eat in Italy?
Pawsta.
German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".