I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
Q. Where do computers keep their money?
A. In a data bank.
Hey baby, are you a cloud server?
Because I have something to upload from my hard drive.
I came into the office early and switched as many M and N keys on keyboards as I could. Some might say I'm a monster...
But others will say nomster
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
Why was the computer sad?
It was going un-node-iced.
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
Why do computers wear glasses?
To improve their web-sight.
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
When my father complained to my mother for never picking or dropping me at school, she looked at him and said, "You are the master of drag and drop, my love". He's an IT specialist...
What happened to the plane run by a computer?
It crashed.
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
I couldn't stop laughing when my father warned my brother, saying, "If you hack my Microsoft Office, I will find you, you have my Word".
Ever hear about the computer programmer who moved to Mexico?
He wanted to be a Señor developer.
Why did the computer parts salesman quit?
He lost his drive.
Keep Your Friends Close, Your Utility Keys Closer.
What do you call a computer that plays tennis?
A server
What is a computer's favorite animal?
A RAM.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
My computer crashed and I lost all the notes I'd saved for the book I'm working on called "1,001 cures for itches."
I guess I'll have to start again from scratch.
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.
Did you hear about the Wi-Fi wedding?
The ceremony was awful, but the reception was great!
Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the Keyboard Factory?
He didn't put enough shifts in.
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
Why do computers make such bad boxers?
Their bark is worse than their byte.
Was going to change my password to MilkyTea but apparently that's too weak.
Why are boy keyboards scared of girl keyboards?
They don't want to get qwerties.
So, if I heat my solid state hard drive until it becomes a gaseous state hard drive
Would that mean I'm doing cloud computing?
Don't use the word "EGG" for your password...
It's very easily cracked.
German Wi-Fi is the WURST.
Why did the computer come with airbags?
In case it crashed.
Hardcore programmers will agree that neither of them would use AC because they all prefer to open windows.
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
One day, I carried my laptop to the zoo because I wanted a RAM upgrade so I would have lots of memory when I came back.
Used to never be able to use the WiFi at my farm until I moved my router to the barn.
Now I have a stable connection.
What do you get when you cross a computer with an elephant? Lots of memory!
Changed all my passwords to Kenny.
Now all I have are Kenny Loggins.
If a cat broke your computer...
Would it be that an error has o-purred ?
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
My wifi password is the cat's birthday month
Feb-paw-hairy
Q. What's a computer geek's favourite snack?
A. Microchips.
My father got a new laptop, and it is now like the baby computer of the house, so we refer to the older laptop as the 'Data'.
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
Why do cats like computers the best?
Cuz they have a mouse.
Did you hear about the new Wifi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
My email password has been hacked again
That's the third time I've had to rename the cat.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
Go to BabaMail
