You know why theater people say "break a leg" instead of good luck?
Because if you do, you'll end up in a cast!
I went to an art gallery and noticed that all the info was also available in braille.
Nice touch.
Did you hear about the artist's really messy house? He said it was 'a work in progress'.
Once I tried to paint the sky but I blue it.
Q: Why did the purple family have to move out?
A: They were plum too loud, excessively violet with one another, and were fuschiatives of the law.
Building a good makeup design always starts with a good foundation.
If you photograph your pimples, is zit art?
Why do thespians have great hair? They want the perfect part.
Why was the artist in an argument? She wanted to have the final clay.
Did you hear about the colorful sea cow?
Oh the hue-manatee!!!
Artists are colorful people who know how to draw on their emotions.
Why was the painter upset when his doctor bought all of his paintings? The doctor thought the paintings would go up in value after his death.
Today, we had to create a new hang position for some lighting fixtures. After all day trying, we couldn't get the new batten hung properly.
Turns out it was just a pipe dream.
TV news anchors love the shades of red. They get serious whenever there is Burgundy.
I just found out that Mercedes is donating state-of-the-art street sweepers to some of the largest cities around the world to help fight littering.
They're calling it Mercedes-clenz.
If a painter ever feels stressed or troubled, they take a vacation to the hills. It will easel their mind!
What is the definition of art theft? A: The haul of frames.
The painter did not want to sit idle because he knew that time white for no one.
The artist shouldn't have taken that sculpture for granite, now it's stone-cold.
I went into my art lesson covered in yeast and flour...
My teacher said, I'm the perfect roll model.
My buddy was cast in Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, but he was still angry because he wasn't Happy.
Whenever my wife is upset I let her color in my black and white tattoos
She just really needed a shoulder to crayon
The painting was framed, so the cops arrested it.
My friend told me he had to leave the play after Act l. Knowing he'd waited forever to see it, I asked him why. He said the program stated that Act ll was two years later, and he refused to wait that long.
What do you call a chameleon that can't change colors?
A reptile dysfunction.
When Papa red wanted to have some toppings on his bread, he told Son red, "Pass me the crimson!"
When the theatre owner dies, his visitation hours are as follows: 1pm, 3pm, 6:30 pm, 9pm, and midnight.
Though my brother won the art competition, he went up to his rival and gave him the credit where it was hue!
I just beat my friend in a Wild West themed art race!
I was quicker to the draw.
In the paintball game, I shot a guy thrice. He dyed on impact.
What's long, surprisingly bigger than expected, comes in different colors, and everyone wants a ride from?
A limousine.
My favorite denim blue jeans just turned brown. I think I will have to call it Dung-arees!
What's brown and sticky? A stick.
The nurse always carried a red pen in her pocket in case she needed to draw blood.
What was the artist's favorite swimming stroke? The brushstroke.
Why did the artist have to go to the bathroom right away? Because when you gotta Van Gogh, you gotta Van Gogh.
I was surprised that although I was supposed to be feeling blue, my heart was not that heavy. Perhaps, I am feeling light blue.
I wasn't expecting to be diagnosed as colour blind.
It really came out of the purple.
I just beat my friend in a Wild West themed art race!
I was quicker to the draw.
This hottie has forever changed the film industry, and it starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'. Reel your mind back in - we're talking popcorn!
Librarians don't like drinking white wine. They prefer the well red ones!
I knew a guy who gave away his art but he only seemed to paint ducks with incomplete faces.
I asked about it once and he said "I like to bill them later."
I thought the play was frightful but I saw it under particularly unfortunate circumstances - the curtain was up.
I thought my ballet-themed body art was unique
But then I saw someone who had a tutu tattoo, too.
After checking my poor results, the art teacher shouted, "Never in a vermilion years have I seen such poor grades"!
Did you hear about the artist that has been drawing very small, colorful noodles?
He drew an itsy, bitsy, teeny-weeny, yellow, polka dot linguini.
The green light at the road signal looked at the red light and said, "Don't look while I am changing".
A pig and a horse walk into a movie theater.
The horse didn't feel like buying popcorn so he brought some hay. A theater employee saw him and said. "Are you sneaking outside food into the theater?"
The horse said "nay."
The pig squealed.
I went to a new kind of show yesterday, which was hosted by a color-changing lizard. He was a good stand-up chameleon.
When I went into my art lesson covered in yeast and flower, my teacher said I was the perfect roll-model.
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