Theater Puns

Dramatic theater puns that deserve the spotlight.

This hottie has forever changed the film industry, and it starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'. Reel your mind back in - we're talking popcorn!
Who are the biggest fans at the theatre? The backstage crew - They're always giving props to the actors.
Why did the Lord of the Rings author get kicked out of the movie theatre.
He was Tolkien all the way through.
Great news! I'm a movie director now! I gave stellar directions to a very lovely family on their way to the theatre.
Theater sound guys aren't always good speakers
My friend told me he had to leave the play after Act l. Knowing he'd waited forever to see it, I asked him why. He said the program stated that Act ll was two years later, and he refused to wait that long.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theatre?
A: They apparently went to see "Closed For The Winter"
The skeleton would love to see the latest horror flick, but he just doesn't have the guts for it.
A classically trainer theater performer just became a spy.
I guess you could say they perform... thespionage
Theatre - the one place it doesn't pay to read between the line.
Today, we had to create a new hang position for some lighting fixtures. After all day trying, we couldn't get the new batten hung properly.

Turns out it was just a pipe dream.
Couple of friends have decided to put theatre style seats in their house. It will end in tiers.
My dad always said the secret to theatre was to always leave them wanting more.
He was a great guy but a terrible anaesthetist.
All theatres love to see scarecrows out in the audience as reviewers! They're simply outstanding in their field.
My grandfather warned people that the Titanic would sink
*No one listened, but he kept on warning them nonetheless until they got sick of him and kicked him out of the movie theatre*
Why do poltergeists love haunting old theaters?
Because they can't wait to boo the performers.
I gave someone directions to a theater today
I guess I am a movie director now.
The stage is the most hygienic place in the world. Every time we turn on the lights they get a wash.
What did the thief steal on the theatre's opening night? The spotlight.
An actor I know fell through the floor recently. It's just a stage he was going through.
Why did the penguin enter the theatre?
He wanted to go into snow business
Why do thespians have great hair? They want the perfect part.
When the theatre owner dies, his visitation hours are as follows: 1pm, 3pm, 6:30 pm, 9pm, and midnight.
Coming to theaters: the thrilling tale of a man who ate biographical books instead of turkey on Thanksgiving.
Baste on a true story.
There are two people who both claim to live in the building where Shakespeare wrote Romeo & Juliet. They should put a plaque on both their houses.
I thought the play was frightful but I saw it under particularly unfortunate circumstances - the curtain was up.
I keep looking at our upstage platform that is designed with only a ladder for access. It's just so hard not to stair.
A prankster played a really dark and dim-witted joke at the theatre. He turned off the lights.
Never date a Theater person...
... wayyy too much Drama...
Opening a new shadow puppet theatre. Business plan says we'll make a fortune, but those are just projected figures.
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