Why did the portrait artist take a side job as a census taker? Because he was great at canvassing people.
Why did the artist cross the street? To crosshatch to the other side.
My friend told me he had to leave the play after Act l. Knowing he'd waited forever to see it, I asked him why. He said the program stated that Act ll was two years later, and he refused to wait that long.
What's the difference between a colorful women's garment and a famous live music venue?
One's a house of blues, the other's a blouse of hues.
Couple of friends have decided to put theatre style seats in their house. It will end in tiers.
What do zombies use to color their hair?
Dye of the dead!
Q: What did the artist say to the dentist?-
A: Matisse hurt
Did you hear about the painter who works in jail? They say he had a brush with the law.
I went into my art lesson covered in yeast and flour...
My teacher said, I'm the perfect roll model.
My least favourite hue is purple. It's worse than red and blue combined.
The green light at the road signal looked at the red light and said, "Don't look while I am changing".
Coming to theaters: the thrilling tale of a man who ate biographical books instead of turkey on Thanksgiving.
Baste on a true story.
The sun's favorite color is ultraviolet. Apparently, it glows with everything.
Q. What do you get when you combine Blue Agave and literature?
A. Tequila Mockingbird
What do you call an artist without a palette? Someone who makes paintings without taste.
Which color is the fastest?
Red, because it is always redy.
When the time came, he betrayed our team and showed his blue colors.
My friend can't afford expensive art, she has no Monet.
A friend has joined a blonds only theatre group. Fair play to him.
A friend of mine was describing an exotic bird to me and asked what was orange and sounded like a parrot. I told him, "A carrot".
The color of the sky can help in predicting the weather. It gives a fair report of the hue-midity.
Q. Why are orange jokes so dumb?
A. Because oranges are afraid to concentrate.
Don't get caught between a chalk and a hard place.
Why did Van Gogh become a painter? Because he just didn't have an ear for music.
The painting was framed, so the cops arrested it.
Why did the girl decide to become an art dealer? Because she wanted more Monet.
Why are artists so temperamental? They have to get into the right frame of mind.
A small step for cyan, a giant leap for bluemanity.
Where do vampires go to buy their art supplies? Pencilvania.
I recently ran a charity marathon to promote greener earth, but the run left me a little jaded.
While building a house, the architect took his fingers and dipped them in a jar of blue ink. He wanted to get the blueprints!
Colors laugh by saying, "Hue Hue Hue."
10 saxophone players blew up a theatre...
authorities are on the lookout for the tenorists.
Q. What is a mime's favorite time of the day?
A. Dusk, because all the colors are muted.
I was under the blues, so I had to blue my nose occasionally.
Where does a cow hang his best paintings? In a moo-seum, of course.
They say that the cardio system is the work of artery, but it is really just vein.
A bear's least favorite pastry at any party is the blue bear-y pie.
If you photograph your pimples, is zit art?
The skeleton would love to see the latest horror flick, but he just doesn't have the guts for it.
Why did the artist get into a heated argument with the gallery curator? He just wasn't in the right frame of mind.
What is the definition of art theft? A: The haul of frames.
Q. Which African animal is the oldest?
A. The zebra. 'Cause it's in black and white.
If Van Gogh were alive today, what might the title of his autobiography be called?
The STARRY of My Life
Blue jeans are immortal. They never die, they just fade away!
My buddy was cast in Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, but he was still angry because he wasn't Happy.
Dark-colored huskies found in Colorado can also be termed as dusky huskies!
Why does everyone paint Easter Eggs? Because it is a lot easier than wallpapering them.
If you don't focus on learning your lines for the production, I shutter to imagine what the reviewers will snap about.
Don't theater jokes always seem so staged?
Go to BabaMail
