How can you tell a wine taster is a newbie?
By the blanc look on her face.
The problem with collecting wine is that you always end up getting screwed.
"Another glass? Wine not?!"
"No wine left behind."
"I'm not a wino. I'm a wineYES!"
"Let's get fizzical. Pass the prosecco."
What do you call the guy who chooses a suitable fortified Spanish wine?
A Sherry Picker.
"Stop and smell the rosé."
Somehow they knew I wanted champagne. It was chilling.
Like a pro wrestler in a headlock, I’m indulging in a little Sham pain.
What kind of wine is aged to purr-fection?
Mos-cat-o!
What kind of wine do traffic cops like best?
Fine wine!
Some people like beer goggles. I prefer wine glasses.
"Here for the right riesling."
"You are so bottlefull to me."
Why does your grandma like wine so much?
Because at her age, she needs glasses!
"Chardonnay or should I go?"
I like my wine sweet and my humor dry.
Did you hear about the little grape who didn’t want to be made into wine?
Unfortunately, he was pressed into service!
Why do wine lovers guzzle down vine humor?
Because wine jokes are a barrel of laughs.
"Partners in wine."
Oh no! My wine glass is empty. Somebody call Wine-One-One!
What time do ladies drink wine?
At Wine O'Clock.
Why do we enjoy wine jokes?
Because they're de-vine!
"Cabernet. More like, caber-yay!"
I hear you like wine, too. Grape minds think alike.
"On cloud wine."
Which type of wine do horses request most often?
Chardon-neigh.
"You can't sip with us."
"My day just went from super to sip-erb, real quick."
Happy Hour is at wine o’ clock
"Wine a little, laugh a lot."
Gluten-free, dairy-free, fat-free – I love this new Champagne Diet!
What happened when a clumsy sommelier tried to decant a bottle of fine wine?
Things went pour-ably wrong.
"Sip, sip hooray."
"It's wine o'clock."
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
"Sip happens."
My doctor said I need to change my diet. He said I should eat more more caviar and drink more champagne. So, I said, "That's insane! What kind of a diet is that?" He replied, "It's called a High Fluten Diet."
This kind of wine does not go right through you. Trust me, you will pee no noir.
"Everything happens for a riesling, right?"