Where do connoisseurs lock up their best bottles?
In a wine cabernet.
Don’t hang around booze hounds. They’re wine-y bitches.
Party Host: Would you like to try some mulled wine?
Party Guest: I'll have to think it over...
This kind of wine does not go right through you. Trust me, you will pee no noir.
"On cloud wine."
There’s a hair in my wine. The grapes must have been fur-mented.
"You had me at merlot."
Fine Wine Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, what are you doing this fall? 'Cause I'd like to make you part of the season's harvest.
"Back that glass up."
Which type of wine do horses request most often?
Chardon-neigh.
Happy Hour is at wine o’ clock