What do you call one green onion that doesn't listen to anyone and is very naughty? It is called a rapscallion!
What is the similarity between my wallet and an onion? Whenever I open both of them, I cry.
What do you get when you put the number 3.14 in the middle of the onions? You get o-pi-nions!
What do you call an onion that carries electromagnetic waves? A photonion.
All the other vegetables have always felt very emotional whenever they are near the onion.
When the onion band covered the song Waka Waka by Shakira, they started calling the song 'Walla Walla'.
What is the name of the onion ring that cannot but be funny? It is a Funyon!
My biology class was going on and on, and I was stuck in the middle of it. Well, you know, this is how it feels to be an on-i-on.
I recently bought my grandson a vegetable-themed pogo stick exclusively made from spring onions.
Did you hear about the man chopping an onion with the Grim Reaper?
He was dicing with death
What do you call a dog who only eats garlic and onions?
A dog with a bark worse than its bite.
When I proposed to my fiancee, she started crying. It must be because I proposed to her with an onion ring.
My wife’s an abysmal cook.
She tried combining corned beef, onions and potatoes…
She made a right hash of it.
On my farm, an entire lot of onions had some allergic reactions that broke out in chives!
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
French onion soup.
What do you call an onion who decides to be very eco-friendly in its approach? You name it a green onion.
An onion just told me a joke.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Whats the difference between onions and girls?
I cry when I cut up onions.
What do you call a communist onion? You call it a red onion.
During the battle between the two onion kings, one of them was on the back foot as it was leek-ing blood.
“Spring, salad, shallot, picked”, said a friend. He knows his onions.
What do you call a sweet onion? Caramelized!
What is the favorite color of onions all around the world? Their favorite color is the o-neon.
When the baby onion died just after being born, the doctors classified it as an o-neonatal death.
Why does Mr. Potato Head have a mobile?
In case Mr. Onion rings.
Why did the farmer decide not to buy an extra phone? It was because he already had one for onion rings.
Which venue did all the vegetables choose to open their fighting club in? An onion ring!
What do you say to a small onion that has helped you?
Thanks shallot.
There was a bull in the neighborhood who would always vandalize my farm. Guess it was because I harvested Spanish onions.
One day on the highway, I saw a packet of onions and cheese walking down the road. When I offered them a lift, they declined by saying that they were 'Walkers'.
Which is the fanciest onion? A cocktail onion.
What did the two onions who were lovers say to each other before being separated? "Our love will forever go-nion on!"
In the history class, the onion teachers taught the student onions that during the vegetable cold war, the Soviet Onion was a superpower.
My wife said that onions are the only vegetable that makes her cry
So I threw a pumpkin at her
What do you call an onion monk who is present everywhere? Ommnion!
What does an onion say when you are upset because of it one day? It says, "I am sorry that I made you cry!"
While cutting the onions, my eyes were leek-ing tears
What do you call a hobbit who has bad breath? He is known as Lord of Onion Rings!
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping onions which made me cry
Onions was a good dog
What kind of chips do you eat in the bath?
Shower cream and onion.
Onions have had a long process in the evolutionary chain. They have evolved into today's onions from onionderthals.