What do you call a communist onion? You call it a red onion.
What do you call a sweet onion? Caramelized!
What happened when the onion tried to cross the bridge guarded by Gandalf? Gandalf shouted, "You shallot pass this bridge!"
What is the name of the onion ring that cannot but be funny? It is a Funyon!
What do you call a dog who only eats garlic and onions?
A dog with a bark worse than its bite.
At the bar mitzvah ceremony, the Jewish onion greeted his uncle by saying 'Shallot'.
My wife said that onions are the only vegetable that makes her cry
So I threw a pumpkin at her
What do all the onions decide to do over unfair wages? They decide to form a labor onion.
What is the onion that laughs a lot and is small and white in color? It is a tickled onion.
Although many other vegetables live above the ground, onions live underground. This is because they have many lairs.
For the last few Sundays, I have been receiving an onion pun in the mail. I don't know who is sending them. Guess it is onionymous.