Why do kids love to clean out the cookie jar for Halloween? To make room for Halloween candy.
The IT peach-guy is an expert in the field of peach synthesis.
Having pineapple on a pizza is quite like going down on a cousin: It might taste good, but something is not right.
What should you drink before you workout? Sweat-Tea.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
Why is the chef so mean?
He beats the eggs.
What is ice cream’s preferred breed of dog?
Dashchundae.
Q: What would a peach love to pet?
A: A Pit Bull.
What happens when you rub two oranges together?
You get Pulp Friction.
What do you call a very feminine cow that likes to be in charge? The Dairy Queen.
I'm the pun King of Halloween.
You can fix a broken strawberry with a strawberry patch.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
What is a cheese lover’s favorite type of music?
R n’ Brie.
What is a pirate’s favorite cheese?
Ched-arrrrgh!
Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill? It ran out of juice.
How do you share a piece of cheese with a bear?
Caerphilly.
When strawberries, blueberries or blackberries meet another berry they like and want to get married who do they go see?
The marionberry
Did you hear about the cheese lover who took his girlfriend for granted?
How dairy.
Do not be sad because of these bad words. You are always a fineapple in my heart.
I think therefore I yam.
What nut is broken?
“A silly nut”
I think it’s funny when I ask girls whether they would spit or swallow my seed if I was a watermelon. Unfortunately, almost all of them reply not in a hundred melon years.
What kind of party is held in a cornfield?
A cornball!
What do prison tennis matches and strawberry jam have in common?
Cons-serve
How do you get a Minecraft themed party started? Let them eat cake.
How many tacos can an octopus eat?
Ten tacos.
So apparently coles has a new thing where you can only have one salad per transaction
They’re calling it coleslaw..
A fruit was madly in love, it was peachy–keen.
If fish is brain food, what do dumb people eat? Noodle soup.
my buddy’s sad after getting fired from taco bell, so being a caring friend i asked if he wanted to
taco bout it?
Why did the students eat their homework? Because the teacher said that it was a piece of cake.
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
What’s a nut’s favorite Shakespeare line?
“To be or nut to be.”
The soup was too spicy to be had by us. It was the borscht soup I had ever had.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite track and field event?
The curdles.
How does Reese eat her ice cream?
Witherspoon.
"Be kind, re-wine."
"Back that glass up."
What did the hot dog bun say to the hot dog? Stop touching my buns! What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it? A "hollow-weenie!"
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Butter.
Butter who?
I butter nut tell you.
A pickle store is giving out their new tea-flavored pickles on the street today
I tried some and I guess they tasted quite a-tea-pickle.
There's no need to cherry your feelings, I know you love me really.
My love for you sprouts more and more everyday!
What do you call a very little cherry? Pit-iful.
What do squirrels eat at the fair?
A-corn dog.
What do you call a pig that can tell you about his ancestors? History in the bacon.
What did the cow say to his friend when they met twice in the same day? “What a cow-incidence!”
The plural of mango should be changed to mengo
An Native American drank 100 cups of tea.
Next day they found him dead in his tea pee.