What is a snowman’s favorite type of burger? A chilli cheese burger with iceberg lettuce.
Who is the corniest baseball player of all time?
Ty Cobb!
Q: What kind of desserts does a turkey like?
A: Peach gobbler.
“My favorite color is tangerine- isn’t that orange-inal?”
What do you call pears with no ears?
Deaf.
What did the corn farmer give to his therapist?
An ear full.
"Chardonnay or should I go?"
I found my son sleeping in a pile of peas. May he rest in peas.
I saw a fruit running from the police recently
It was a water felon.
Where does Thor grow his vegetables?
In his Asgarden.
What's green and pecks on trees?
Woody Wood Pickle.
Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake? Because it's too hard to put them on the bottom!
What is the name of the onion ring that cannot but be funny? It is a Funyon!
Don't use raw milk to make butter
It's not worth the whisk
My girlfriend said we aren't getting married until she has a pear shape
It's the reason we cantaloupe
Why wasn't the bag boy allowed to work at the juice bar?
Because baggers cant be juicers.
What did baby clock ask mama clock? Where's father Thyme.
What do you call a cute donut?
A-dough-able.
What happens if a cashew falls down your shirt?
It becomes a chestnut.
What does a pizza say when it introduces itself to you?
Slice to meet you.
What's an egg's favorite movie?
Over Easy Rider.
What did Snow White call her chicken?
Egg White.
What do you get if a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
What does the ginger bread man put on his bed? A cookie sheet.
I recently went to a soft fruit party, where all the food was berry based. It was cherrific.
Did you hear about the salad race the other day?
The Lettuce was ahead, but the Tomato was ketchoping up...
Why do wine lovers guzzle down vine humor?
Because wine jokes are a barrel of laughs.
What is the chemical formula of the molecules in sweets? Carbon-holmium-cobalt-lanthanum-tellurium or CHoCoLaTe
Why are hot dogs angry? Because they are always getting roasted.
I love the smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies They smell just like burned toast
Onions are great at being psychologists as they let people cry their hearts out in front of them.
My wife just started an all-fruit diet.
There was enough food to make a mango crazy.
How did the avocado feel after a day at the gym?
Hard core.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
What is the difference between a pineapple and a school bus? The little pricks are at the inside of the bus, but on the outside of the pineapple.
When soup feels strained and stressed, where would it go? – A broth-el!
The favorite drink for batman is a fruit punch.
You’re wine in a million.
We had made everything for the party and the groom came in, did a quick assessment and didn’t seem amused. “Orange you glad we did this?” we asked him.
An apple and an orange signed up for a tournament. No one was really surprised when they had both were seeded.
What cheese cries the most?
Babybel.
The jam bank went bankrupt because of the series of strobberies in the last quarter.
How does cabernet like to travel abroad?
On a cruise sip.
What do you call a fat pumpkin?
A plumpkin!
Why was the bread actor so unhappy?
She lost out on a juicy roll.
They say that the local baker is the breadwinner of his family. True enough.
What do you call an anthropomorphic animal blended in ice cream?
A McFurry
I can't get my wife to try Mediterranean food.
She doesn't like hummus, which is a naan-starter.
What was the ice cream cone’s naughty pick up line?
Wanna lick me?
Where's a pickle's favorite place to go in London?
Pickle-dilly Square.