What would you call a steak that leaped off the table and ran away? Fast food, of course.
What did the steak say to his enemy? I have a T-bone to pick with you!
What did the Cheese salesman say? That cheese may be Gouda, but this one is Feta!
What happened when the butcher backed up into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work!
There’s this corn on the cob stand that I really like, but it started making ads
They were really corny.
I tried looking up ice cream puns on the Internet...
But then my browser froze.
What's the name of the meatiest Knight of the Round Table? Sir Loin!
What do you call someone who’s crazy about corn?
A corn-ivore!
I was making a salad the other day, and I thought I heard a small red vegetable that was a bit like an onion whispering. Must have been a hoarse radish.
The veggie lover was a total stalk-er.
What vegetable did King Arthur pull from the stone?
Exparagus.
I almost got a world record for having the most peas up my nose but sadly I blew it.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to open the door.
Q: What do you call an angry pea?
A: Grum-pea!
What do you call someone who steals from the keebler elves? A crook-ie
Why do you always bring a bag of chips to a party? In queso emergency.
"Darling, shall we buy some vegetables for tonight?"
"Yes, lettuce!"
What did the mom cheese tell the little boy cheese when he got hurt on his bike?
“Gotta take the gouda with the bad.”
What kind of beer can you make from a potato?
Spud Light.
On what radio station would you hear Bob Dill-on?
Vlasic rock.
What did the worm want to do when he grew up? He wanted to join the Apple Core (Corps).
What do you call a chicken staring at lettuce?
Chicken sees a salad.
A strawberry's favorite celebrity is Mary Berry.
What’s the best part of a cow? The topside, of course.
What's an astronaut's favorite meat? Launch meat!
I got canned from a Orange juice factory...
Just couldn't concentrate.
What do u get from a perverted apple? Hard Cider.
Who does the nectarine just do a hair transplant? Because it wants to become a peach.
What does a caped monkey superhero drive?
A banana-mobile.
What do pigs drive? Pigup trucks.
What do you get when you cross a goblin and cheese? Muenster cheese.
Some types of meat like to play around a lot. These are generally the game types.
What are strange donuts made out of?
Weird-doughs.
I thought of a new joke that started in a corn field.
But I'm not going to post it bc it's too corny.
Q: Where do fruits like to go on vacations?
A: To the peach.
What's a vampire's most favorite fruit? It must be a neck-tarine peach.
What eats nuts and bolts?
A squirrel that’s running late.
Why did the boy leave his chestnuts in the rain?
He wanted them rusted.
What happens when two coffee lovers disagree on their favorite roast? It turns into a heated debate.
What is the left side of an apple? The part that you don't eat.
What happened when a clumsy sommelier tried to decant a bottle of fine wine?
Things went pour-ably wrong.
Did you hear about the little people starting a beer making operation?
It's a micro brewery.
What kind of nuts come in cans?
Creamed a-corn.
What rhymes with orange?
No, it doesn’t.
Why was there peanut butter in the middle of the road?
It went with the traffic jam.
Wine Lovers Rhyme: A friend of wine is a friend of mine!
Why did the burglar break into the bakery? Because he heard the cakes were rich.
Why was the orange feeling sad?
It lost its zest for life.
What happens to a cherry tree when it grows up? It blossoms.
You've really struck a gourd with me...