I can’t remember who it’s by, but you could have “It Started With A Hershey’s Kiss”.
Did you hear about the crab that went to the seafood disco? He pulled a muscle
"Oh, sweet child of wine."
People who use sleeping bags in the woods are soft tacos for bears.
I must confess that I've started stealing vegetables from the local grocery...
I can't help it! I get to the store and I have to take a leek!
What do fruits do when they are avoiding a problem? They cherry their heads in the sand.
What's a baby gherkin's favorite TV channel?
Pickleodeon.
How do you know when a cheese is full of himself?
Whatever you say, he’ll say he is feta.
What do you call juice with no ice in it?
Ju.
My town always holds a contest to see which beer drinker's belly is biggest by seeing how far it goes past a line...
That's the paunch-line.
How do you make sweet corn?
You whisper sweet nothings in its ear!
This special peach school is for those Peach kids who are suffering from peach and hearing impairment.
What type of keys does the gingerbread man unlock his door with? cook-keys!
Mom: Why did you shave the peaches!
Dad: The recipe asked for nectarines.
I was throwing oranges at tropical birds. One of them caught one then said: “Toucan play that game”
What do you call an avocado after a priest blesses it?
Holy guacamole.
What is a monkey's favorite cookie? Chocolate chimp!
Knock Knock
Who’s there Justin Justin who? Justin time to make the donuts!
In the 1970s, hippies loved going to a Grateful Dead concert and getting toasted. That’s certainly the truth.
What is soap's favorite brand of beer?
Sud-light
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
When she asked me if I like soup, I replied saying "I am crazy pho soups".
The informant obtained their information by burying themselves in the ground, disguised with a crown and some rind. Police called him the pineapple plant.
The retiring orchard gardener made a farewell peach that was really heart-warming.
You should never give milk to someone who is open minded and hasn't yet had breakfast. They're lack-toast and tolerant.
What's yellow and always points to the north? A magnetic banana.
When the orange started peeling, he was glad it was finally cutting some weight.
When I told my friend an onion pun, he started crying. I asked whether they were tears of happiness?
What do you call a fruity pop star? Katy Peary.
How do you describe a polite german lemon?
Bitte(r)
I'm worried that the milk I got this morning was from a cloned cow. It tasted exactly like the milk I had yesterday.
The man on the table found hair in his soup. He said in rage "I will take the chef to soup-reme court".
What do you call young avocados?
Avokiddos.
Why didn’t the peach do well on its ACT? Because when it comes to education, it only gets a little STEM.
Why did the cheese get in trouble?
It was up to no gouda.
I heard that my neighbor, who loved dried fruit, has passed away. May his soul rest in peach.
The cheap baker only paid his employees a flourly rate. Cheapskate!
What do leprechauns love to barbecue? Short ribs!
My son ate daffodil bulbs instead of onions
But that's really serious! Is he in hospital?
Yes, he's still a bit yellow, but he should be coming out in the spring.
What do you call yogurt that is terrified of other dairy products? A cow-ard!
What is a cheese lover’s favorite type of music?
R n’ Brie.
What did the orange say before jumping into the juicer?
“The zest is yet to come!”
How does an ice cream cone congratulate you on the anniversary of your birth?
It’s sherbert day!
What do you call a sloppy Joe made with taco seasoned beef?
Sloppy José
On which website will you learn about the hidden gossips and secrets of the onion world? On the website Wiki-Leeks.
The pancake thought he was the best breakfast food because nobody stacked up to him.
During the summer break, I enrolled myself in a peach coding course.
What is yellow on the inside and green on the outside? A banana dressed up as a cucumber !
What made the baby cookie cry so loud? His mother was a wafer so long.
What do you call really scared pasta?
Chicken noodles.