What's a coffee's favorite spell? Espresso Patronum.
If you coriander into my tomato soup, you will give me a soup-herb dish.
What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie ? Puff pastry !
When is the peanut butter due to arrive?
In a Jif.
"Oh, sweet child of wine."
Why did the one legged clown leave the cheese circus? Because he couldn't get his stilton.
Why did the burglar break into the bakery? Because he heard the cakes were rich.
Why did the cow fall down while being milked? Because the rug was pulled out from udder it.
I was going to tell you a joke about an egg but it's not all it's cracked up to be.
How did the vineyard launch the new champagne making business?
They crashed a small boat into it.
You know why I love bread puns? Because they never go stale.
What did Mrs. Pea say to his wife after she refused to listen to her? "I don't care, just do as you peas."
What did baby clock ask mama clock? Where's father Thyme.
just bought 5 slabs of San miguel, 10 sombreros and 25 tacos,
I'm Hispanic buying
What cheese do beavers like? eDam
Pizza: the only time top-less isn't fun
Why was the pizzeria desperate for business?
Because they kneaded the dough!
The manager at the bread store told the baker that he had to stop loafing around. The baker said that it was his job.
What kind of cheese protects a castle?
Moat-zarella.
Where do they make all the decisions on a dairy farm? At the city cow-ncil.
What do you call a pickle from the southern backwoods.
A hill-dilly.
Q: Did you hear about the pea that changed careers?
A: He went into a different field!
What do you say to an avocado who’s done a good job?
“Bravocado!”
Excuse me waiter, I have a question about the house salad.
Does it come with window dressing?
What do you call a group of butchers coming together? A meating.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef!
What do you call the king of vegetables? Elvis Parsley.
Dad: Did you hear about the cow that was arrested?
Kids: No.
Dad: He was uddermining the authorities.
What does a cheese lover say when someone keeps messing around with them?
“You gouda brie kidding!”
I love the smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies They smell just like burned toast
How do you sum up a cashew?
In a nutshell.
When do they smother a burrito in cheese? In best queso scenario.
I met him yesterday, he was on his way to meet the counselor for a peach therapy session.
"You focaccia bag, crumb back and get it."
Why is cherry pie so legendary? Because it is history in the baking.
"Alcohol you later."
What is a donut’s favorite day of the week?
Fry-day.
What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake, of course!
The bread did not believe that he could work at his job much longer. He was feeling too crusty.
What time do ladies drink wine?
At Wine O'Clock.
When you finish the lemons that life gives you;
Sublime.
Q: What made the green pea turn red?
A: It saw the salad dressing.
Somehow they knew I wanted champagne. It was chilling.
So apparently coles has a new thing where you can only have one salad per transaction
They’re calling it coleslaw..
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?.
Dad: How does a farmer keep his cows in line?
Kids: How?
Dad: He keeps them a-cow-ntable!
What do you call two watermelons that are not allowed to get married? A couple of can’t- elopes.
People say nothing rhymes with orange. It seems very strange to me.
How do you get a musician off your front porch?
Pay for the pizza.
What do dogs like to drink? Kit-Tea.