What does a nosey pepper do? Gets Jalapeno business.
What kind of tea did the American colonists want? Liberty.
What’s the National Donut Day theme song?
“Donut Stop Believing.”
Vegans really have a beef with meat.
Q: Why wouldn’t the teacher bring the class to the green pea farm?
A: It was in a seedy part of town.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants!
How do you know that beer makes you smarter?
Because it made bud wiser.
I squeezed the innards of a pumpkin into a glass, and the result was just beautiful
In fact, it was gourdjuice.
Which religious figure does dairy products worship? Cheese-us!
Patient: "Nurse im suffering from bacon disease!" Nurse: "Baloney"
What does a lemon pie and my wife have in common?
They both have meringue on them.
What is a snowman’s favorite type of burger? A chilli cheese burger with iceberg lettuce.
A strawberry usually needs batteries when it runs out of juice.
What do you call a house that likes food? a Condoment!
Eggs are going up again.
That'll surprise a few chickens.
Love is also like a pineapple: They both are undefinable and sweet.
Some people prefer milk after it has churned. I guess they find it butter that way.
Time fries when you’re having fun!
I got canned from a Orange juice factory...
Just couldn't concentrate.
What do you call an onion that carries electromagnetic waves? A photonion.
What did the steak say to his girlfriend? You're the apple of my rib-eye!
What do you do when a pickle wants to play cards?
Dill'em in.
What is a ghost peppers favorite Leonardo Dicaprio film? Catch me if you Cayenne.
"Alcohol you later."
My local ice cream man was found dead in his garage covered in strawberry sauce and hundreds and thousands.
Police believe he topped himself.
Why is green ice cream so serendipitous?
It was mint to be.
Why did the hot dog turn down a chance to star in a major motion picture? None of the rolls (roles) were good enough.
And what should every barista say to their customers? Have a brew-tiful day.
What type of relationships do hotdogs like to have? A frank relationship, they can’t stand lies.
My peach friend shaved for the first time the other day, he looks like a nectarine!
A strawberry will never help another strawberry because they tend to always get into jams.
just witnessed a chicken try to pick up a piece of corn for 5 minutes,
ImPeck-able.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky!
I love having dinner in a local restaurant. It has a soup-erb speciality that mixes soup and herbs.
No one laughed at my soup puns. I said "When I crack a soup joke, everyone is soup-posed to laugh".
Knock Knock.
Who’s there? Donut. Donut who? Donut ask, it’s a secret!
Why was the orange feeling sad?
It lost its zest for life.
What's a baby gherkin's favorite TV channel?
Pickleodeon.
What did the vegetables say to the Salad Dressing? Lettuce all smile.
Bad vegetable puns are dreadful.
It’s a truly rotten experience.
What's the best way to get King Kong to sit up and beg? Wave a two-ton banana in front of his nose.
What do you call a pig that practices karate? A pork chop!”
As a butcher, let me advise you never to back up into the meat grinder. It will make you get a little behind in your work.
What kind of candy makes fun of you? Tootsie Trolls.
Do you know what the favourite soup of a ghost is? It is the Scream of Broccoli.
Why did the orange become juice?
It couldn't handle the pressure.
Which nut is worth the most?
A cash-ew.
When we spill soup on the comic book, we will get soup-erman.
Which nut has won the World Cup the most times?
A Brazil nut.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cash.
Cash who?
No thanks, I prefer walnuts.