Why doesn't cheddar like to party with crackers? Someone always cuts the cheese.
How does a cheese tell you they want to be with you?
“I think you and I would look gouda together.”
What do you call a grilled cheese sandwich that's all up in your face? Too close for comfort food.
What do you call a flying cheese?
A curd of prey.
What do you call cheese that is acting crazy? A basket queso.
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.
Why was the cheese asked to leave the restaurant?
The cook said “we don’t serve your rind here”.
What hotel do cheese lover’s stay in?
The Stilton.
What does a cheese lover say when someone keeps messing around with them?
“You gouda brie kidding!”
How does the Cheese Detective choose his clients?
On a queso by queso basis.
What were the cheese’s wedding vows?
To havarti and to hold.
Why do cheeses make bad musicians?
They’re always sharp.
Why didn’t I believe what the cheese salesman told me?
It was too gouda to be true.
Did you hear about the guy who opened up a store where they only sell Swiss cheese?
It’s a hole business strategy.
What is a lions favourite cheese? Roar-quefort.
What did one cheese say to the other during philosophy class?
“I dis a brie.”
What drives cheese crazy?
That everyone around them is crackers.
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
What did the commedian say after after a bad set?
That crowd was laughtose intolerant.
What is a lions favourite cheese? Roar-quefort
What Welsh cheese must you always eat with caution? Caerphilly
What activity should you do when you’re babysitting little cheeses?
Build a roquefort.
Why couldn’t the cheese sleep?
He was scared there was a munster under the bed.
What do you get when you cross a smurf and a cow?
Blue cheese.
What did the Cheese salesman say? That cheese may be Gouda, but this one is Feta!
Where should you call if you find a bad cheese shop?
The feta business bureau.
Did you hear what happened when the decorator painted his wife with cheese? He double Gloucester!
How did the cheese professor start class every day?
Oh queso…
What cheese surrounds a medieval castle? Moatzeralla
What do you call a cheese that is an alcoholic? Livarot
What is a basketball players favorite kind of cheese? Swish cheese!
What did one cheese tell the other cheese on Valentine’s day?
Brie mine.
What covers the floor of the motzarella forest?
Cheese sticks.
What did Shakespeare say as he was making a cheese plate?
To brie or not to brie.
What did the cheese call himself after he got dumped?
Forever provolone.
How do you know when a cheese is full of himself?
Whatever you say, he’ll say he is feta.