What did the aged cheddar say when his mom told him he couldn’t see a movie that was rated R?
“I’m mature for my age.”
What is a cheese lover’s favorite track and field event?
The curdles.
What covers the floor of the motzarella forest?
Cheese sticks.
What kind of cheese to beavers eat?
Edam.
What kind of cheese protects a castle?
Moat-zarella.
What do cheese makers dance to on halloween? The muenster mash!
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
What cheese do beavers like? eDam
What is a cheese’s favorite kind of philosophy?
Epistemology and fetaphysics.
What do you call cheese who attends art openings?
Cultured.
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
Roarquefort.
What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to their date?
“You make me melt.”
Did you hear about the cheese shop that was destroyed by a tornado?
All that’s left is da brie.
What did Shakespeare say as he was making a cheese plate?
To brie or not to brie.
Whats the best cheese to coax a bear down a mountain? Camembert (Come On Bear)
Do you want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it's too cheesy.
What wisdom did the daddy cheese pass down to his son?
A curd in the hand is worth two in the bush.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite rap artist?
Feta wap.
What activity should you do when you’re babysitting little cheeses?
Build a roquefort.
What do you call a flying cheese?
A curd of prey.
What's the most popular American cheese sitcom? Curd Your Enthusiasm
What group of cheese has been known to fly? Curds of prey!
Why does the Pope love Swiss cheese so much?
It’s hole-y.
What cheese surrounds a medieval castle? Moatzeralla
What do you feed the son of god? Cheeses of Nazareth.
What do you get when you cross a goblin and cheese? Muenster cheese.
What do you call a grilled cheese sandwich that's all up in your face? Too close for comfort food.
How did the cheese get such curly hair?
It got a permasan.
Did you hear about the guy who opened up a store where they only sell Swiss cheese?
It’s a hole business strategy.
Did you hear about the cheese failed to medal at the olympics? It fell at the final curdle
What kind of cheese do alcoholics eat?
Livarot.
What did the cheese say to the other cheese? I smell something swiss-picious!
Why did the cheese get in trouble?
It was up to no gouda.
How do you share a piece of cheese with a bear?
Caerphilly.
What kind of cheese do rodents like? Mousearella.
Why did the parmesan swipe left on the cheddar?
His pick-up line was too cheesey.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite musician?
Mozart-arella.
Which search engine is popular amongst mice? Ask Cheese.
Why was the cheese asked to leave the restaurant?
The cook said “we don’t serve your rind here”.
What do you call a socialite made of cheese?
Paris Stilton.
How do you get a mouse to smile? Say cheese!
What did the street cheese say after he got attacked by several blades? I've felt grater.
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
What did the cheese call himself after he got dumped?
Forever provolone.
What drives cheese crazy?
That everyone around them is crackers.
What do you call a cheese that is an alcoholic? Livarot
What is a basketball players favorite kind of cheese? Swish cheese!
What do you call cheese that is acting crazy? A basket queso.
What do they say when you leave the cheese store?
Have a gouda day!
What is the name of the country near Iraq that is made entirely of cheese? Curd-istan