What do you call the second tissue paper?
Kleenext.
How do you work out how many rolls of toilet paper are in 4 packets of 16?
Multiply.
My neighbour didn't like it when I told him off about hoarding toilet paper
To be honest, I think he was being very anal about it.
Why do toilet paper rolls have trust issues?
They're always getting ripped off.
A man has to go, but has no toilet paper. His friend says to wipe with a dollar. He comes back all dirty, so his friend asks "What is that horrible smell?". So the man says,
"Hard to wipe with 3 quarters, 2 dimes and a nickel"
"Have you seen our toilet roll?" asked my wife.
"Don't be silly," I replied.
"A toilet is a stationary object."
Have you heard Mariah Kleenex's big holiday single?
It's called "I Don't Want a Snot for Christmas"